Chapter 2: who that babyboy

paintingwithtaels: so whos going first

hoesuccsdicc: ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME MEME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME

ridejimin: cheeky meme in there, i like that

junglecock: author u bitch u just wanted to occupy more lines didn’t you?

pinkbiatch: wat

junglecock: nvm lets just carry on

junglecock: hobs go first

junglecock: and make it short

hoesuccsdicc is typing...

I Would Put My Real Name Here But You Could All Be Serial Killers For All I Know: Please, not another essay.

pinkbiatch: i’ll just go instead

pinkbiatch: name’s kim seokjin, 25, uni graduate and currently a **********/stripper

pinkbiatch: but like lets say im an exotic dancer because its classy

yoongayaf: hmu with the club name

hoesuccsdicc is typing...

pinkbiatch: never

paintingswithtaels: woah u can dance

pinkbiatch: no i can just slut drop

junglecock: cue the receipts

I Would Put My Real Name Here But You Could All Be Serial Killers For All I Know: um wow

I Would Put My Real Name Here But You Could All Be Serial Killers For All I Know: this is beautiful

I Would Put My Real Name Here But You Could All Be Serial Killers For All I Know: i have seen god

I Would Put My Real Name Here But You Could All Be Serial Killers For All I Know: daddy

ridejimin: OMfG YEASTY BIHTC FORGOT TO CAPITALIZE

junglecock: THIS IS THE FIRST TIME HE’S EVER NOT CAPITALIZD I SWEARHE ALWAYS DOES

pinkbiatch: i am so flattered.

ridejimin: Whipped™

hoesuccsdicc is typing...

paintingswithtaels: ew

paintingswithtaels: he said daddy

yoongayaf: ummmMM whats wrong with that

paintingswithtaels: i hate that. like imagine if it went both ways

paintingswithtaels: “your so hot i wanna make you my child”

junglecock: now that you say it like that, that's disgusting

pinkbiatch: well ppl do call their SOs baby sooooooooooooo

paintingwithtaels: omg.

junglecock:

yoongayaf: who that boy

yoongayaf: he cute af

yoongay: babyboy

yoongayaf: jungkook who is he?? TELL ME I NEED TO KNOW THIS MUNCHKIN

ridejimin: ………………

ridejimin: …………………….

ridejimin: ……………………………………

yoongayaf: what now

ridejimin: that would be me.

yoongayaf: liar.

ridejimin: not lying. i can prove it

ridejimin: heres a selfie

yoongayaf: how do u delet msgs here?

ridejimin: you cant.

yoongayaf: ****.

junglecock: OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HYUNG HAS A CRUSH THIS IS AMAZING AIFOIJIFJIOVJNIOFSNOI’NFIOFNIOFN SO CUTE

yoongayaf: shut up

hoesuccsdicc is (still) typing...

paintingswithtaels: OMFG THEY ARE SO CUTE I FUCKING CANT U CUTIES GET MARRIED ALREADY

yoongayaf: I SAID SHUT UP

pinkbiatch: GAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY **** NOW PLS AND RECORD IT TOO I WANT FOOTAGE

yoongayaf: U LIL FUCKERS I STG IM NO SON OF MY MAMA IF I DONT KILL YALL

I Would Put My Real Name Here But You Could All Be Serial Killers For All I Know: I ship it.

yoongayaf: what did u just say?

I Would Put My Real Name Here But You Could All Be Serial Killers For All I Know: Nothing.

yoongayaf has saved the media file sent by ridejimin…

yoongayaf: wait what no why does it say that

yoongayaf: MISCLICK I STG I DIDNT SAVE IT ON PURPOSE

paintingswithtaels: HE SAVED THE PIC NEXT THING U KNOW ITS GONNA BE HIS LOCKSCREEN I CANT WITH THESE TWO KOOK BABY LOOK AT THIS

junglecock: I AM BABE

junglecock: yoongi hyung way to make ur crush so obvious

yoongayaf: says the guy who just called his alleged friend babe

paintingswithtaels: we are just friends jeez why does everyone misinterpret it

junglecock: yeah. just friends man.

pinkbiatch: AYO RIDE DUDE U HAVE AN ADMIRER WHO THINKS UR ADORABLE

ridejimin: u creep

yoongayaf: IM NOT CREEPY I SWEAR IT HAPPENED ON ITS OWN

junglecock: hOBI HYUN LOOK AT THIS

junglecock: hobi hyung?

junglecock: where did he go?

hoesuccsdicc: hey guys! my name is Jung Hoseok but you can call me hobi ^-^ ! i’m probably one of the funniest guys you will ever meet. Trust me, i’m hilarious. i’m 23, my birthday is on the 18th of feb so im am aquarius. my current hair colour is orange because i wanted a hair colour that represented me so i chose orange because ua know im a fucking ray of sunshine. i’m currently majoring in dance. its my passion and honestly, i couldnt imagine going a day without doing it. just feeling the rhythm and getting into the music and letting your body lose to its own intentions gives a feeling beyond comparison. i do rap as well, a hobby (or hobi) that yoongi hyung who you guys might know as yoongayaf helped me discover. He’s my BFF FOR LYFFFFFFFF I LOVE HIM. so my celeb crush is g dragon because he’s an actual fucking daddy yes jiyong pls my assjole is open wide for you. anyways im from gwangju and my fam consists of my parents and my sister. i rly love my parents you know they're so sweet and supportive of me and they keep me going thru all the hardships i encounter. sis is cool too. other hobbies of mine include the occasional sport. i like tennis. tennis is cool. i once got third place in a championship!!!! my fav food is sprite and my fav colour is green and my fav number is 7. i was once upon a time a part of this rly cool dance group called neuron but sadly enough we broke apart because one guy got to ambitious.

link to my youtube channel: https://www.youtube.com/Hope-On-The-Street

link to my mixtape: https://www.soundcloud.com/J-Hope/1-Verse-Saved-My-Fucking-Life-This-Is-Not-An-Actual-Link- But-Don’t-You-Fucking-Wish-It-Was//

ig: @hobsbobs

tumblr: @brightsunshine

now you know me better yay!

seen by junglecock, paintingswithtaels, ridejimin, yoongayaf, pinkbiatch and I Would Put My Real Name Here But You Could All Be Serial Killers For All I Know at 19: 48

hoesuccsdicc: gUYS WTF CMON

Today, 20:31

ridejimin: waddup im here who’s online

yoongayaf: ew why are you here

ridejimin: stfu u find me adorable

yoongayaf: no i dont

ridejimin: scroll up bitch u think i forgot?

yoongayaf: lets just forget it ever happened yeah?

ridejimin: how abouttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt no

yoongayaf: kys

paintingswithtaels: u cuties

ridejimin: im the only cute one

junglecock: tru

yoongayaf: what

junglecock: HYUNG I WAS JUST KIDDING HAHAHAHAHAHAHA pls dont kill me

yoongayaf: okay then :)

ridejimin: why are y’all so scared of him

junglecock: hyung is scary af

hoesuccsdicc: i live with him and i once saw him raging at a game and i fucking pissed my pants he's so terrifying

junglecock: ive only ever seen him smiling in emojis

hoesuccsdicc: off topic

hoesuccsdicc: but why havent none of y’all said anything about my intro

pinkbiatc: probs cuz none of us have gotten to reading it yet

hoesuccsdicc: why not

ridejimin: maybe cuz its so fucking long

ridejimin: as long as my ****

yoongayaf: last time i checked it was an essay and not 3 words long

ridejimin: honestly **** you man

yoongayaf: **** you? no thanks

ridejimin: you would tho

hoesuccsdicc: tsundere love

hoesuccsdicc: sometimes beautiful

hoesuccsdicc: sometimes so fucking annoying

pinkbiatch: you both would have the best angry sex

junglecock: seconded

ridejimin: why am i here again

I Would Put My Real Name Here But You Could All Be Serial Killers For All I Know: Hey Hoseok. So I read your essay about yourself and you sound like someone I would get along with very well! And damn, a mixtape, that’s fucking cool.

hoesuccsdicc: aww thanks dude! you are literally the only one i like here

pinkbiatch: can u slut drop

hoesuccsdicc: yes but not as good as u tho ;)

pinkbiatch: love the kid

pinkbiatch: i approve

pinkbiatch: you can be on my list of people i dont hate

hoesuccsdicc: i cri a single tear in honour

paintingswithtaels: you seem cool hobi :) we can try being friends

hoesuccsdicc: thanks for giving a chance babieee

yoongayaf: that tennis competition he was talking about? yeah there were only three teams

hoesucsducc: did u have to

pinkbiatch: unfriended

I Would Put My Real Name Here But You Could All Be Serial Killers For All I Know: For a second I genuinely thought you were talented. Turns out you’re a loser.

paintingswithtaels: remember when i called you cool? yeah i take that back

hoesuccsdicc: YOONGI HYUNG WHY

junglecock: guys cmon cut him some slack

hoesuccsdicc: thank you finally someone who understands me

junglecock: we need to understand that losers like him have to coexist with kool kidz us so that we can outshine them

hoesuccsdicc: can i die

ridejimin: Woah a mixtape!! u cool dude

hoesuccsdicc: u r the only one who thinks im cool i love you so much i will do whatever u want

ridejimin: im too lazy to click on the link tho send it here?

hoesuccsdicc: ofc bby here you go

hoesuccsdicc has sent 9 mp3 files…

ridejimin: this is actually pretty fucking cool

I Would Put My Real Name Here But You Could All Be Serial Killers For All I Know: Hobi you’re music is fucking good. We have to collaborate sometimes.

hoesuccsdicc: you do music too?

I Would Put My Real Name Here But You Could All Be Serial Killers For All I Know: Yup. Wanna hear some of my work?

hoesuccsdicc: yes pls

I Would Put My Real Name Here But You Could All Be Serial Killers For All I Know has sent 15 mp3 files…

hoesuccsdicc: THIS SHIT IS LITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

yoongayaf: i love the lyrical content

yoongayaf: your beats go perfectly with the vibe of the song

pinkbiatch: **** ur voice send moan audios pls i could fap all day to this shit wowoowoow gimme more

I Would Put My Real Name Here But You Could All Be Serial Killers For All I Know: Why moan audios when you could listen to it live?

ridejimin: bitch am i smelling some friends with benefits shit

pinkbiatch: SEND ADDRESS NOW

I Would Put My Real Name Here But You Could All Be Serial Killers For All I Know: Only if you send nudes.

pinkbiatch: HAVE ME BITCH

junglecock: woah since when did joon hyung gets so smoooooooth

yoongayaf: nah but srsly

yoongayaf: u are good nerd

yoongayaf: we have to make some stuff together

yoongayaf: all 3 of us

hoesuccsdicc: YAY HIP HOP SLUMBER PARTY

I Would Put My Real Name Here But You Could All Be Serial Killers For All I Know: How are you the same person as the guy in your mixtape?

paintingswithtaels: aww u cutie hobi

hoesuccsdicc: love you toooooo

junglecock: say wot

ridejimin: “bite everyone so they wont forget it” he said

authornim has joined the chatroom

authornim: guys continue with the intros and stop getting sidetracked

junglecock: who tf are u i didnt add u

authornim: pce

authornim has left the chatroom

pinkbiatch: they are right let's continue

junglecock: is no one srsly gonna question the fact that someone just joined and exited

I Would Put My Real Name Here But You Could All Be Serial Killers For All I Know: Should I introduce myself?

hoesuccsdicc: go for it

junglecock: apparently not, we're all being brainwashed

I Would Put My Real Name Here But You Could All Be Serial Killers For All I Know: Hey guys! Kim Namjoon here. I’m currently at Seoul University pursuing a career in Biotech Engineering. I’m in my second year. I’m 23 years old and my birthday’s on the September 12. My hobbies include rapping, reading, researching, writing poems and being Kim Seokjin’s bitch.

pinkbiatch: honestly we are the only stable relationship here

I Would Put My Real Name Here But You Could All Be Serial Killers For All I Know: True

paintingswithtaels: OTP

junglecock: bubble what about yoonmin

paintingswithtaels: o yeah whoops u guys are my second fav

ridejimin: can u guys be my dads

hoesuccsdicc: namjin shall be ur ship name

yoongayaf: nah titanic

yoongayaf: because its gonna sink pretty soon

pinkbiatch: woah.

I Would Put My Real Name Here But You Could All Be Serial Killers For All I Know: Dude, jeez, we were just joking around. You don’t have to be so harsh.

paintingswithtaels: that's kinda mean yknow…

junglecock: too far hyung too far

ridejimin: HAHAHAHAHA GOOD ONE BRUH

hoesuccsdicc: these fuckers i stg

hoesuccsdicc: u both are so insensitive

ridejimin: it was kinda funny…

yoongayaf: ikr

yoongayaf: still hate u tho

junglecock: still find u cute tho*

yoongayaf: this will stay with me until the day i die

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