episode 4

Don't touch me. " I slap his hand away. Hating myself to showing him any hint of vulnerability.

"I'm sorry, okay," he continues, not losing his grip on my shoulder. "Those girls meant nothing to me."

"I don't give a f-"

He shoves his mouth on mine, trapping me in his arms. Past me would have melted at that, but new me had every trigger bell going on.

"Get off me." I punch his chest, trying to push him away, but he holds my arms firmly in place. He grabs the back of my neck and kisses me again, harder this time more forceful.

I kick, i bite, I punch all that in vain. He corners me to a wall, and that when panic kicks in. I can feel his hand forcefully trying to undo my shirt, to inch my breast. Pushing the weight of his body on me so that I stay in place, he places a hand around my neck. At that moment, I turned cold and froze in place to scared to move.

Memories wash over my brain. My body shooks uncontrollably.

"D..don't, don't, don't." I can feel the tears rolling down my cheeks.

Suddenly, I'm 10 again forced to the ground, while a man tries to pull my shirts down. I screamed for my mom, my dad, but no response....

"..please..." That's all I manage to get out of my trembling lips. That when he looks down and realises what he had done.

In that moment, I gather my thoughts, pull my head back, and bang my forehead. against his.

"Arhggg"

he steps back, then another step. Groaning in pain, his hand rubbed his forehead

"Eli, I'm...." almost as if the head but woke him up. Regrets flashing through his eyes, but the damage was already done.

I go down and hug my knees, trying to calm myself. A sharp pain pierced my head. Oxygen seems to have thickened, I try to grasp some air as much as I can. My body is trembling uncontrollably.

"Eli, calm down....lets-"

"Don't you come closer, you bastard!" I yell, hugging myself tighter.

"I'm sorry...I.. I forgot.. I didn't mean to..." he starts to apologise, but he knew exactly my past trauma.

"GET THE FUCK OUT!!" I was a mess right now and didn't want anyone to see me that way.

He lingered around for a few more second then left without saying a word.

....

I stay there. Alone having a panic attack. Trying to chase away the memories flashing her mind and a massive headache.

RING....RING....RING.

Diego's name flashed on the phone screen. I try to collect myself, then i picked up.

....

i say somehow with a neutral tone.

Of course he did.

i considered for a second

I lie.

he hesitates a little. he says in a low comforting voice.

I say trying to brighten my voice.

he says, not convinced

I ruch

I hang up.

Diego has always be a like a brother to me he knew me too well. I place down my phone.

Today had been very long, I've been walking and trying to play boss for way too long. It was already noon. Everyone was probably gone for lunch. I do a mental note on the work I have to finish by tomorrow.

Unknowingly, my eyes shut, and I drift to a deep sleep.

translation;

Amar-love

Hermana-sister/sis

Te amo-love you

Yo también te amo-love you too

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