Heart breaking,pain and hurtness

Tae finished his song and saw Jin is standing there while tears are falling from his eyes. He come to tae and pat his head.

Jin; what happened bear ? Why I am feeling like your heart is all shattered? Why I feel like my bear is all hurt and drown in pain. What happened to my happy bear.

Tae: nothing hyung I am fine . (Plain voice)

Jin; I know my bear is always silent type person. He doesn't show his emotions but doesn't know that his hyung know all his hidden pain but doesn't know the reason. What happened bear ?

Tae: nothing hyung I am all fine (cracked voice )

Jin; cry bear it will help you. It will reduce your some pain. Tell me whenever you feel like but for now cry your heart out baby.

Tae kneel down and put his head on Jin's lap later cried his heart out. Jin love him so much. he can't see his brother In law like this . He love his brother in law just like his own baby. He keep caressing his back later tae fall asleep in Jin's lap. NJ come there for calling taejin for dinner. He saw tae is sleeping like baby.

Nj; did he fall asleep?

Jin; I don't know what happened to bear. But why seems like he is in pain so much pain.

NJ sit beside Jin and side hug him while his one hand was caressing tae's back.

Nj; maybe some study stressed. You are always so protective towards the maybe you are overthinking.

Jin; no Joon I am not. My bear is in pain. I can understand by looking at his eyes. What happened to my bear ? I always understand his every pain but why it's seems so unpredictable to me ? What my bear is going through (crying)

Nj; jinni let's go and eat something. Bear need time to accept the relationship. Maybe he is upset with us. Maybe he want to choose his life partner by himself and today's proposal make him sad.

Jin; hope so joon.

Nj; now come it's not good to not eat anything till this late. Baby will be hungry now.

Jin; let's go I will come later to give him food.

Nj; ok.

Nj come to tae and place him in the bed later left from there. After they left tae open his eyes and saw their disappear figure.

Tae: life always become beautiful when someone is near you . I have so many person around me but still one person's absence hurt me. Maybe the person is my last piece of a puzzle. The person is a way of my love. Love is beautiful. Without lover love doesn't seems that much beautiful. Without him I am feeling hurt by the same love which I used to cherish sometimes ago . Today my life turned upside down. First heartbreaking then a relationship proposal. But isn't it I am being cruel to the person whom I will get married. One thing I know I can't love anyone in my whole life. I can't give him love. Hope he will understand and if he want to get free from me I will be more then happy. I don't wanna be reason of someone's pain. I don't wanna be the reason of  someone's painful life. What should I do ? My heart is reaping and it's paining so much. I can't show my miserable state to anyone. Whom I will show the one I wanted to show is not mine. Why it's paining a lot? Is this the same love which make me feel heaven sometimes ago. Guess what in world there is no heavens.... If world does heaven then it's just allusion only. Fault is mine I shouldn't expect love from you. My love is not pure baby. I shouldn't expect that you will also love me. I should love you by thinking about the negative side too. But honestly baby I never look at someone's the way I look at you. I never feel something for anyone which I fall for you. In this feeling I forget you also have your own life. It could be possible you don't love me.

I shouldn't do this all. But baby I just want to show my love I want to make you fall for me too . Is it that much selfishness or any crime ? All my life I did just assuming things. And now this fvcking assumptions are hurting me. I deserve this pain. I am ok with it. But to be honest love I am not ok. I am not. I need you love . I need you by my side.....will you stay with me love. Look here I am again assuming things. How could you stay with me ? Yoi will be in your hus ... husband's arms. Why my heart is peeling like it's ozzing blood . Why I can't even imagine you are in someone's arms . Why this is hurting like a hell thinking you will standing in a aisle looking like an angle as usual. The beauty of your's what should I say about your beauty love. There is nothing to say. Then you will take vows. Seal them with your beautiful lips attaching with someone who is not me. And this shit hurts a lot. Do you know today I also write a letter and now it's no use. I will throw them no no it's for you how can I ? I will keep them like treasure too close to my heart. My every letter is useless now . No meaning of those thrash. Si many song I wrote for you still there is no meaning of those songs. Do you know baby you are my everything but I don't have right on my everything. You are my love not love my bearth my heartbeat. Sometimes I think I shouldn't love you like this. Will you hate me if you ever got to see me. Them pls don't Hate me love. I will die at the next moment.

He come to his belcony and look at the Sky feeling the soft air lingering in his face. He close his eyes and look at the moon .

The moon is all bright maybe taunting him as he always compare his love with this moon. He chuckel and turn around to leave but no he didn't. He stand more time to feel the cold breeze . At this time he couldn't hold back his tears. It's falling from his eyes. He can't help just cried feeling worse of himself. Blaming him for loving someone this much that his whole existence become a jokes now. He look at the sky and

Tae: are you mocking at me at my state? Well you can bcz now I am feeling myself a bloody joker here. It's hurt a lot. How can you endure being heartbroken. You can say me bcz now I am also heartbroken here. By the way you are looking good but not like him. His doe eyes always have some sparkle looking like it's belong to any angle . His hair like a wave of sea. But when it's move little by little it's look like some silent wave in silence sea. His button nose is way more then cute . It's become more cute when he become angry and his nose and cheeks become red due to anger. He is something which can't explain by world. His pink lips feel like a rose petal looking ethereal in every way. His mole under his lips is just cherry on the top. No one can say his beauty with words. How beautiful he is . His face is just like some kind of fresh flower. His face is nothing but some magic. He is magical but he is not mine.

He doesn't belong to me.

With a chuckle he start mumbling a song.

💤You are the star of the night that is on my sky

That's why I wake up at night and watch over the happiness of my heart,

You are dewy golden morning to me

One look at you makes me drunk.

You are to me the treasure of seven kings victorious in battle

I found you like a heart in a hundred obstacles,

I will not give my heart to anyone

I keep you in my heart, I don't even know.

No matter how many excuses you make, I will not let you go

I'll go crazy, but I won't back down.

I love the smell of your sweet hair

I want to lose myself in you,

My mind doesn't mean it, don't stay away anymore,

My heart does not mean that, and do not stay away

My dear bird, you live in the harp,with a absence mind.

I will not give my heart to anyone

I keep you in my heart, I don't even know.

I will not let you go no matter what excuses you make

I'll go crazy, but I won't back down.

If I see you for a moment, this mind does not stay in my house

He feel restless about knowing what,

I don't know anything, why don't you come,

I don't know anything, why don't you come,

For me you are a flood of light in the dark room.

I will not give my heart to anyone

I keep you in my mind, you don't even know.

I will not let you go no matter what excuses you make

I will go crazy but I will not leave behind.

He sleep while mumbling. The floor coldness is nothing which his heart is feeling. It's doesn't feel any pain bcz heart is feeling worse pain then ever.

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