chapter 3
The family car pulled into the grocery store parking lot.
Alex gripped the steering wheel like a war veteran, already regretting bringing this circus.
He said, turning to the others,
Alex
We’re going in, we’re buying what we need, and we’re leaving. No chaos. No drama. No distractions.
Icey 🎀
Of course. I’ll behave
Moonshine
That’s what the devil said before he invented disco.
Lian Beb fixed his hair in the rearview mirror for the tenth time.
lian beb
Relax, Alex. Some of us are born to look perfect in public. It’s my civic duty to bless society with my beauty.
Alex
Lord give me strength.
---
Inside the grocery store, everything went downhill instantly.
Icey grabbed a cart and immediately started throwing random things into it—pickles, six jars of mayonnaise, a frozen turkey, three bottles of shampoo, and one inflatable pool toy.
Alex yanked the shampoo out.
Alex
“We don’t need this!”
Icey 🎀
But it was on sale! And look at this—pineapple-flavored toothpaste! Isn’t that innovative?
Alex
That’s not toothpaste, that’s floor cleaner!
---
Meanwhile, Lian Beb had gotten lost near the cosmetics aisle. He was standing in front of a mirror display, trying on sunglasses one by one.
lian beb
Hmm… am I more of a mysterious mafia boss, or a tortured poet?
A worker walked by and muttered,
don't know
Sir, this is a grocery store.
Lian flipped his hair dramatically.
lian beb
Beauty has no boundaries, my dear civilian.
---
Moonshine was the true menace. She shuffled through the aisles with her cane, loudly roasting random strangers.
A man walked by with a cart full of chips.
Moonshine squinted at him and shouted:
Moonshine
BACK IN MY DAY, WE FOUGHT WARS! YOU LOOK LIKE YOU’RE PREPARING TO FIGHT CONSTIPATION!
A lady picking apples got hit next:
Moonshine
Sweetheart, no matter how many apples you eat, it won’t fix that haircut.
Alex nearly died from secondhand embarrassment.
Alex
Moonshine, PLEASE stop insulting people—
Moonshine smacked his leg with her cane.
Moonshine
Shut it, flour boy. You still look like a failed snowman.
---
By the time they reached checkout, the cart had:
2 frozen turkeys,
4 random candles,
7 types of chips,
a toilet brush,
and Lian Beb’s new sunglasses (that he refused to take off).
Alex
We came here for MILK. JUST MILK.
Alex let out a scream that echoed through the whole store.
Moonshine patted his back.
Moonshine
Don’t worry, boy. Alcohol is cheaper anyway.
Comments
𝔜𝔲𝔞𝔫 𝔖𝔲𝔯𝔣𝔢𝔯
really? doesn't look like 💅🏻*seeing u *
2025-09-04
1
𝔜𝔲𝔞𝔫 𝔖𝔲𝔯𝔣𝔢𝔯
grandma is from old generation 🤣
2025-09-04
1
😂🤣🤣 great
......I have only thought those in mind in real life
2025-09-04
1