Prologue 1
Mud squished beneath his booted feet as Kim Taehyung or Taeh as he usually referred himself turned, off the lane and pushed open the white wooden gate that opened into a front yard of a modest little house where he's living.
His cheeks were rosy and his eyes bright as he stopped to glance at the star lit sky, studying them with the unspoiled delight of an innocent fifteen-year-old boy at Christmas
Smiling, he hummed the last few bars of the Christmas carols he'd been singing all evening with the rest of his friends, then turned and went up the walk toward the darkened house.
Hoping not to awaken his parents or his younger brother, he opened the front door softly and slipped inside. He took off his jacket and hung it on a peg beside the door, then turned around and stopped in surprise. Moonlight poured through the window at the top of the stairway, illuminating his parents, who were standing just outside of his mother's bedroom.
His mother was struggling in his father embrace
Mrs Kim
I can't! I just can't!
Mr. Kim
Don't deny me, Jiwoon
Mr. Kim said, his voice raw with pleading.
Mr. Kim
For God’ sake, dont-
Mrs Kim burst out, trying frantically to pull free from his arms. He bent his head and kissed her, but she twisted her face away, her words jerking out like a sob.
Mrs Kim
You promised me on the day that Sunoo was born that you wouldn't ask me again. You gave me your word!.
Taeh, standing in stunned, bewildered horror, dimly realized that he had never seen his parents touched one another before - not in teasing, nor kindness - but he has no idea what his father was pleading with his mother not to deny him.
Mr Kim let go of his wife, his hand falling to his sides.
He said stonily. She fled into her room and closed the door, but instead of going to his own room, Taeh's father turned around and headed down the narrow stairs, passing within inches of Taeh when he reached the bottom.
Taeh flattened himself against the wall, feeling as if the security and peace of his world had been somehow threatened by what he had seen. Afraid that his father will notice him if he tried to move towards the stairs, and his dad would know that he had witnessed the humiliatingly intimate scene, he watched as his father sat down on the sofa and stared into the window. A bottle of liquor that had been on the kitchen shelf for years now stood on the table in front of him, beside a half-filled glass. When his father leaned forward and reached for the glass, Taeh turned and cautiously placed his foot on the first step.
Mr. Kim
I know you're there Tae
His father said tonelessly, without looking behind him.
Mr. Kim
There's little point in our pretending you didn't witness what just took place between your mother and me. Why don't you come here and seat with me? I'm not a brute you must think me.
Sympathy tightened Taeh's throat and he quickly went to sit beside him.
Taehyung
I don't think you are a brute, father. I could never think that.
The older man took a long swallow of the liquor in his glass.
Mr. Kim
Don't blame your mother either
He warned, his words slightly slurred as if he had been drinking since long before he arrived.
With the liquor impairing his judgement, he glanced at Tae's stricken face and assumed he had surmised more from the scene he'd witnessed that he actually had. Putting a comforting arm around his shoulders, he tried to ease his son's distress, but what he told the younger increased it a hundredfold
Mr. Kim
It isn't your mother's fault, and it isn't mine. She can't love me, and I can't stop loving her. It's as simple as that.
Taeh plunged abruptly from the secure haven of childhood into cold terrifying adult reality. His mouth dropped open and he stared at his father while the world seemed to fall apart around him. He shook his head, trying to deny the horrible thing his father had said. Of course his mother loved his wonderful father!
Mr. Kim
Love can't be forced into existence
Mr Kim said, confirming the awful truth as he stared bitterly into his glass
Mr. Kim
"It won't come simply because you will it to happen. If it did, your mother would love me. She believed she would learn to love me when we were wed. I believed it too. We wanted to believe it. Later, I tried to convince myself that it didn't matter whether she loved me or not. I told myself that marriage could still be good without it."
The next words ripped from his chest with an anguish that seared Tae's heart.
Mr. Kim
"I was a fool! Loving someone who doesn't love you is hell! Don't ever let anyone convince you that you can be happy with someone who doesn't love you."
Taeh whispered, blinking back his tears
Mr. Kim
"And don't ever love anyone more than they love you, Tae. Don't let yourself do it."
Unable to contain the pity and love exploding inside him, Taeh looked at him with tears spilling from his eyes and laid his smaller hand against his father's.
Taehyung
When I marry, I shall choose someone exactly like you.
His father smiled tenderly at that but made no reply. Instead he said
Mr. Kim
It hasn't been all bad, you know. you're mother and I have Sunoo and you to love, and that is love we share
Comments
mika0613
I like this. In discrimination only author mention that this story is not hers but the original author
2025-07-20
2