나는 너와 함께 늙어가고 싶어

I wanna grow old with you

[FULL FAN FICTION | STORY NOT MINE, DON’T RE-UPLOAD, SHARE, LEAK. FYI, THIS IS NOT MINE.]

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“Are you asleep?"

In a daze as he slowly fell asleep, Jeong Taeui faintly heard a whisper in his ear.

Each light touch fell on the cheeks, temples, then gradually moved to the corners of the eyes, then left and the kisses stopped on the eyelids and fell like a constant rain.

"Uhm.. hm.."

Jeong Taeui moved slightly as if he had heard but no longer had the strength to respond.

Perhaps lying in this man's arms after a bout of passion has become a habit.

He thought that if he could just fall asleep like this, for a moment or forever, it would be a very peaceful, very reassuring prospect.

The rooms of Jeong Taeui and this man - Ilay Riegrow, on the same hallway and next to each other, have remained unchanged for many years. But strictly speaking, Jeong Taeui's room was literally more of a room than Ilay's.

It wasn’t because he spent very little time at home, but because I live with him in Berlin; he rarely left home for too long unless it was a particularly important occasion.

Usually 1 week, the longest is 1 month, but not to the point where the room is covered in dust and no one cares. In the past, Rita would be the one to clean the room (even though the room was so tidy that it hardly required much attention), but since she’s dead, Jeong Taeui has done that job for her.

Simply swing by from time to time, ensuring that the room will always be ready for the owner to return.

So why does his room always feel unusual? Sometimes Jeong Taeui thinks. And he got the answer immediately.

He never left a trace no matter where he went. Even when he was at UNHRDO when he was a second lieutenant of Ilay, his room was always like that.

Time to clean up at the end of the year. And this is also the only place where Ilay occasionally leaves traces of his existence, no matter how small. But they don't sleep in the same bed.

Except for the times he spent all night with him after trips away from home due to work, seeing this man in a deep sleep still made Jeong Taeui feel unfamiliar. Furthermore, Ilay is especially good at sleeping.

It's like when he sleeps but there is still a third pair of eyes observing everything around him.

That is also another characteristic habit of him. There are habits that cannot be changed or not, but belong to instincts - survival instincts. And that instinct will not let anyone be an exception.

Jeong Taeui silently sighed even though his eyes were still closed tightly.

'This guy... why didn't you go back to your room today and stay so long?'

He could feel his soft smile from the sound of the wind blowing on his neck.

"Will you let me sleep?"

He snorted and muttered.

"Me? Yes, certainly."

He snorted and muttered.

"Then, why do you just keep kissing me and won’t leave me alone?"

His voice was a bit angry but he still didn't open his eyes to confirm how he was feeling.

"Hmm.. I'm gonna do it until you go to sleep."

Having finished speaking, the arm wrapped around his neck gently pulled him towards him a bit.

This time the kiss fell to the top of the head, the hand gently caressing the cheek as gently as sweeping a feather.

'Forget it...'

Jeong Taeui thought and decided to put his mind to sleep.

"Tae.. Taeui..."

"Jeong Taeui..."

The whisper was so soft that it was faint as if echoing from another realm far away. That call didn't need to be answered, both of them knew that, so Ilay continued like that for a while, while Jeong Taeui moved slightly to show he had heard.

Suddenly, he raised his hand to hold the hand that was caressing her cheek, pulled it to his lips, and kissed the soft palm:

"What's wrong with you today?"

"You have a little wrinkle here."

"What?"

Based on the words and the warmth that occasionally blew into his ears, he knew that Ilay was very close. But unexpectedly, when he opened his eyes, he was still a little startled because his face was right next to him. If he moved a little closer, he would touch the tip of his nose.

"Here. Under your eyes."

Ilay's thumb gently stroked the corner of his eye. His first reaction was to frown slightly in confusion. After hearing the problem Ilay was talking about, he felt even more confused:

"Uhm.. a wrinkle? So why does it matter?"

"No. Nothing. I just suddenly realized something I haven’t noticed before."

Ilay added.

"What means that you are getting older."

"Hey... It's the same with you, isn't it? And you have them too."

I don't know if it's too one-sided, but in general, the aging rate of Asian people is usually slower than that of Western countries.

This has nothing to do with physical health or anything, but if you have to choose, you have to choose. Guessing an Asian person's age just based on their appearance seems to be a more difficult task.

He observed Ilay.

Ah, still nothing has changed.

His expressionless face made it impossible to guess what he was thinking, looking no different from him yesterday. Suddenly, he raised his hand, two fingers lightly touched the corner of his lips and pulled them up into a smile.

Perhaps because of his own stupid actions or because of Ilay's puzzled face, Jeong Taeui suddenly burst out laughing.

It was only softly but it lasted for a long time, causing Ilay to hold his hand, biting the tip of the finger:

"Hmm?"

He stopped laughing.

His eyes and Ilay's eyes met.

The two of them kept looking at each other as if they wanted to find their own silhouettes in the bottom of each other's eyes, as if they could see deep inside what the other person was feeling through their eyes. Ilay was the first to speak.

"I like yours. It makes you look softer."

Jeong Taeui still looked intently at Ilay.

"Tsk.. Especially when you're looking at me right now, or the way you smile like before. Suddenly I have the feeling.."

Jeong Taeui raised his eyebrows as if he was waiting for him to finish his sentence.

But Ilay just stopped and leaned down to kiss the corner of his eye, the tip of her tongue lightly gliding over the faint wrinkle that Jeong Taeui himself didn't notice until just now when he looked in the mirror every morning.

Ilay moved away from Jeong Taeui, his eyes, which usually could be as sharp as razor blades when their owner was angry, now looked strangely gentle.

Oh, only now did he realize.

It's not that Ilay hasn't changed at all.

It was those eyes that were curled up with a smile that told him.

When someone is next to you, day after day you and that person can see each other, then you will never notice the change in the other person if it is not too obvious. That person lives with you, one day and the next, you don't see any difference.

But until one day you turn around and suddenly see that everything is different. Whether it's appearance, appearance or even personality. Time always works the same way.

"You have the feeling?"

Jeong Taeui asked again.

"The feeling you are all mine. From head to toe. Even your time, your life. It's mine, Tae. You're mine."

Ilay smiled slightly.

"...."

"One more thing I've realized is that you are getting older; and as you said the same to me. We're getting older together."

Jeong Taeui was speechless.

Suddenly he felt surprised, mixed with confusion.

He wondered if he knew the meaning of what he was saying, or at least if he was saying what he was thinking.

Choosing to be with this man was completely voluntary.

Over the years, although some things have happened, he has nothing to complain about or blame fate for letting him meet this man. this man.

What people often say is, I am willing to be by the other person's side, whether rich or difficult, whether sick or healthy, until my hair turns gray... perhaps there is a similar part.

Jeong Taeui suddenly felt strangely confused. While he was still thinking about himself, the moment he met Ilay's eyes, he suddenly fell silent.

Reasonable... from a certain perspective...

This man, who was so perceptive that sometimes it didn't seem like a human being, was understanding what he was thinking and what he was saying.

If so; Jeong Taeui shook his head.

I don't want to think any further.

What I feel right now is not bad at all. But soon that strange feeling turned into a smile on his lips. The two looked at each other, not knowing who started it, they were immersed in a deep kiss without any questions or explanations.

That's life, no matter how many ups and downs go by, just a moment like this makes me see how worth living and how beautiful it is. I like this life.

The life he chose with no regrets. As for Jeong Taeui, this man is the same.

"Ilay"

He whispered that name countless times.

"I wanna grow old with you."

[END]

(cttro)

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