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They've been talking online for a month now, but she only knows surface-level details about him: his love for Russian songs and literature, black cats, Dhatura (jimsonweed) flowers and this overwhelming passionate sensitivity towards oceans.

He's from Jharkhand and currently pursuing his B.tech in electrical engineering at IIT Hyderabad, the same city as her.

Their connection didn't start through a dating site; rather, developed within a shared mental health community online.

Despite their regular conversations, she couldn't sense any genuine attempts at friendship.

There was an underlying secrecy, a hidden hostility, though his texts always remained politely composed.

She couldn't quite put her finger on it, but something felt off—like a lingering scent of decay.

Amid the uninteresting details, one confession stood out.

Ding!

"I love you." 

She still believes it's just another one of his whimsical jokes.

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Zeke : "What vehicle would you choose if you knew you were gonna die in an accident?"

They were talking about their favorite childhood books awhile ago, now death.

Why did it always had to be this intense with him?

She was amused by how random and odd his mind was, she wanted to learn more of it.

Sal : "A yellow scooter. wbu?"

Zeke : "I would choose my own suv. I want to stay with my loved one (my suv) during my last few seconds. But more importantly, why a scooter and why yellow?" 

Sal : "If I'm gonna die, I shall die cute. Additionally, I think yellow scooters bring a lot of attention so more people would gasp and mourn over my death."

Zeke : "Your brain would get splattered all over the road, still it would be cute. "

And such was his love, insane.

Zeke : "But no stranger would mourn; they would simply offer pity. That's the extent of their capability."

**Sal : **"Scratch that, tell me about your suv."

Zeke : "It's my dad's SUV. Spent a lot of time in it as a kid. Whenever the house got too noisy, I'd find solace sitting inside it."

Sal : "Did your sisters come along with you?"

Zeke : "My sisters were the reason I sat there.

I used to gather my books and read in there. I learnt Python(programming language) in it's back seat."

She hungered for these little details as if she was trying to connect dots for his behavior.

She was resilient with her pursuit in trying to decode what made him have this profound affection for her, why he fixated on her being, and what prompted the frequent "I love yous," despite her never saying it back.

Sal : "I see"

Zeke : "I jerked off once or twice in there. "

And like always he stood as her endearing puzzle, a cipher she could never fully unravel.

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Author's note :

I urge you all to read this on Wattpad. The name is "I don't know yet" with the same cover and my username is @1remindmeagain1

Thank you for being here.

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