Chapter 2

My mother and I used to wear matching outfits and go for walks, and long drives. When I was a day scholar she used to beat me with the sticks if I failed to answer the questions. It was really painful, but in a hostel, I missed her scolding and beating. She used to pat my head when I was asleep.

When I was in 5th grade my mother told me my father married another woman. After hearing it I was devastated. It was the end for me the end of my hope. Even though I hated my father I had a hope that when the right time came my mother and father would be together, my last hope was shattered. Everybody told me I was a good girl. I did what everyone told me to do even if I hated doing it because I wanted people to think good about me. It was during summer break after I passed 5th standard on one cold Night, and my elder sisters (not by blood)lit a fire and were just chatting then they told me how my mum liked this uncle (who was very nice to me)and wanted to marry him but was afraid I would hate her and not talk to her. The next day even though I did not want it I said to my mother "Mom....if...if you find a person who would take care of you and loves you...and...if you want to marry him, you can! I have no objection. I would be happy if you could move on in your life and find happiness". My heart beat like it was going to explode saying that I smiled at her and went outside, it wasn't what I wanted in reality it was the opposite of what I wanted. I did not want her to marry someone else. I wanted her to get back together with my father just like the old times, but I didn't say that because it would have broken her heart My father was settled, and my mother was going to be, so I thought this because of my selfish needs I don't want to destroy 4 lives its better I shut up and endure my pain like I have always had.

As years went by my mother and I drifted apart. I realized it when it was too late. In the past, she used to stay up all night when I was sick, at that time I took all this for granted but as I grew up I wished that I was sick because it was the only time she and I were close.

I felt lonely, god sent me a gift through my mother. She was the prettiest thing I saw. She was my sister(from another father) but since I was in a boarding school I never got much time to spend with her, and I was not a family person. I liked it alone.

After 1-year god sent me another sweet little sister from my father's side which I was unable to cherish due to circumstances. My mother always scolded me saying that I changed. I know I changed because sometimes some circumstances change people.

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