First Escape

Every woman dreamt of wearing a long white gown while walking down the aisle as the man of her dreams patiently waits for her on the other end. I envy those people who already found their significant other. Most of my friends were successful in their careers and engaged or married. They were living the kind of life that they have prayed for while here I am, still single and haven’t achieved anything. Well, I never really cared at first but whenever we met, I’m always the center of attention; not in a good way, like they would always put me in a hot seat.

“What?!? After all these years, you’re still single?!?” the exact words I’ve heard from them during our last dinner together. I tried to avoid them at some point; I couldn’t handle the pressure that they were putting on me. I’ve had a lot pressure from my family already and I just couldn’t deal with it anymore when they were doing the same thing. So, I decided to take a break from everything for a while. I took an indefinite leave from my job though it pays me well, I took a break from my family’s pressure and nagging of when I’m going to get married, and I took a break from my friends whom I thought would understand and would support me.

It has been nine months since I decided to start a new beginning here in England. It was hard, really hard. It was autumn when I took my first steps out of the airport. I felt the cold breezy air and I saw the leaves gently falling from the trees. I’ve always dreamt of seeing it for real and I’m glad that finally it happened. Everything was different here, from the people, culture, views and lifestyle. I’m starting to love my life in here. But of course, it didn’t mean that I’m going to be here for the rest of my life. I still have to settle a lot of things before I decide to come back home. Not for now but I would never say never.

I took a deep breath while lying on my bed. I’m just staring at the ceiling, doing absolutely nothing. My back still hurts from checking the deliveries and carrying the boxes of the new books. “I hope the bookshop won’t be crowded today,” I said while tracing a smiley face up in the air. I got out of bed and prepared for work. I always prepare ahead of time so I could stop by at the coffee shop for breakfast and read a good book while waiting for Mrs. Andrews to open the bookshop.

Mrs. Andrews, the owner of the bookshop where I work part time. I was strolling downtown when I saw the bookshop and I decided to take a look inside, hoping that I could read some books. I spent the whole afternoon reading and fixing some books on the shelves when she saw me. She introduced herself and asked for my name. She was really kind and I liked the way she laughed. She offered me a part time job right away and told me that she liked me. She needed an assistant since the bookshop just started to operate three months before my arrival in England. We both love books and we could relate to each other. I felt her sentiments while she was talking and she caught me off guard when she told me that she liked my humor and my way of thinking.

“You’re a smart girl, I’d love having you here,” the last words she said when she offered me the job. I needed a distraction to relax my mind and without any hesitations, I said yes and accepted her offer.

I arrived at the coffee shop one hour before the bookshop opened. The bookshop was just one block away from the coffee shop, a five minutes’ walk would be enough to reach it on time. As I opened the door, I smelled the aroma of the coffee.

“Hmmmm, I love this smell! Good morning Tia!” I said.

“Oh! Hey Samantha! Good morning! How are you?” Tia greeted.

“Well, I’m fine. Thanks for asking and what about you?” I answered while preparing to order.

Tiffany, my cousin who also decided to move out for a while, away from her manipulative father. Actually, she’s my best friend. I prefer to call her by her nickname, Tia. We were on the same age and it felt like we grew up together though she lived miles away. We spent most of the time together during her vacation in the Philippines. Her mum is a Filipina and her dad is a noble English man. She wanted to be independent so she decided to make her own money by having her own business, this coffee shop. We both dreamt of having a business, a coffee shop and good thing, she was able to achieve it. She wanted me to work with her but if her mum finds out, I’d be in a big trouble. Her mum doesn’t hide anything from my family. As much as possible, I would stay away one foot at a time. It was such a relief to know that her parents were living overseas now. Tia understands me more than anyone else. She has been my back up since my day one in England.

“So I assume it’s the same thing today?” Tia asked while smiling.

“Yes please! And could you please add more cookies!” I answered while handing her some pounds.

“Sure cookies lover! You’re my cousin and my best friend but save your money, I’m not accepting it. Buy some make up and dress up! You might meet Mr. Right out there,” she said while laughing.

“What’s wrong with this T-shirt and jeans?” I answered while pouting.

“Well, nothing. You look good whatever you wear but sometimes you also have to make some room for changes, you know.”

“Thank you so much for that wonderful concern my dear cousin. But you could please let me have my coffee first before we continue this conversation.”

“Alright, here you go! My most valued customer.”

“Hahaha, that’s funny!”

“I want my customers to be happy.”

“Uggghh, whatever!”

“Enjoy your coffee milady.”

I looked back while rolling my eyes and she laughed.

I went to my favorite spot where I spent most of my day off writing my poetry. It became my favorite since I could see the views from the outside. I love how the leaves fall from the big maple tree across the road. There’s a playground next to it and during summer, I could also see the kids playing. I love how the tree changed during the four seasons. Autumn’s my favorite; it’s a reminder to me that sometimes there’s beauty in letting go. I wanted to know how it feels to meet someone while the leaves were constantly falling from the trees. I wanted to know it feels to have someone around. But I knew in myself, I’m just not ready yet for any romance. Before I left to go to the bookshop, I scribbled some words in a sticky note.

“I’m not closing my doors so happiness will come in.”

I left it on the table and then bid goodbye to Tia. I hope this day would be good to me.

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