Surprise, surprise!

"Ugh, alright. Let's just get over with this..." I said. As that's what I did. I'm used to people making fun of me because of my looks or my behavior, and honestly, I don't give a **** anymore.

So many idiots and bitches do that to me daily and it's not like I can do anything about it... So what's the point in suffering or trying to fight? God, who the hell am I kidding?! Of course, I care! I will always care about the stupidest things and I have no idea why! The shitty fact is that I don't know why I care so much about every single damn thing in this world, but I can't stop myself either...

---------------------------------------------------------

After the photo shoot, at the lockers...

(Samantha's POV)

"See? I told you it won't be that bad..." Alice tries to lighten up my mood, but helplessly, unfortunately.

"Let's just dump this topic. Please, Al, I don't wanna talk about it." I bite back a little irritated, not even looking at her.

"Oh, ok then... I'm sorry, Sammie." She says in a sad tone as she starts to rub her arm.

"No, I'm sorry for being such a burden to you..." I lower my head and sigh. Even if she doesn't want to say it to me, I know I'm not good for Ali...

Letting those words out of my mouth, I shove my head in the locker, so she won't see the tears that try to escape my eyes...

"What? No! Sam, you've never been a burden to me, hun! I love you!" She says as she gets closer to my locker, trying to give me a reassuring hug...

"No! Please don't get closer, Ali. I... I don't want you to see me now..."

"Ugh... Come with me." She says as she pulls me out of the locker and closes it, then takes my hand and guides me to the bathroom.

As soon as we get there, Alice shuts the door behind us and makes sure we're alone. After assuring that the coast is clear, she fixes her gaze on me for a few moments, then decides to break this awful silence we were drowning in.

"Hey, look at me, Sam." She then takes my head with both her hands and makes me look in her beautiful hazel eyes...

I've never had such mesmerizing eyes, mine have always been colored in a dark shade of brown and they seem more and more ugly to me every day because I see everyone around me with such amazing blue, green, amber and hazel eyes... Even people with brown eyes like me, but with a very beautiful shade that makes you want to look at them for hours... I've never had that, but God knows how much I wanted someone to look at me the way they look at Alice... Or at anyone else, actually...

Anyway...

"How many times do I have to tell you this? I love you so damn much you dummy! Nobody hates you, and if your mom does then she's a fucking bitch that doesn't deserve you!"

"Ali, please stop... We both know you're lying... Even if you love me, and I want you to know that I love you too though, but everybody else hates me... Especially mom."

"Why would you think that everyone hates you?" Realizing that trying to cheer me up like that won't work, she tries to find out my reasons, but that's even worse... I really don't intend to share them...

I sigh and stare at her for a little, not knowing what to say, but I eventually decide to **** every single thing and I spit out the first phrase that comes to my mind.

"Well, why does everyone avoid me? Why don't I get invited to parties as you do? Why didn't any guy--"

She quickly interrupts me, saying this in a pretty mad tone...

"Your first kiss doesn't matter that much, Sam! There are so many girls out there, and even in our school, that haven't had their first kiss yet. It's not such a big problem, you know..."

"It's so easy for you to say that... You have Caleb and he loves you so much..."

She quickly reacts to my sentence with a loud and sarcastic laugher as my eyes widen and my confusion gets to the highest possible level.

"Ok, so first of all, even if it might sound selfish, I don't give a shit about how Caleb feels about me, even though I don't think he's actually in love with me. My parents forced me to be with him since second grade and I must say that I hated him ever since."

After processing what I've just heard, I have to admit that a little laugher rose inside me and wanted to escape my mouth, but I drowned it, I better shut up and see where this goes...

"And secondly..." Alice pauses for a moment and it seems like she's thinking about what to say next. " Do you want me to break up with him? Seriously, I'll do that if it makes you less sad. That will make us both feel better" she giggles.

"No! Of course not! How could you think I'd ask you to do something like that, Alice?! I've never been sad or jealous because of him being your boyfriend! I was just saying..." I sigh, letting my head down again...

"Ugh... I really wish there was something I could do or say to take all your pain away and make you happy... Because I'd do it in a blink of an eye if I knew that would make you smile again, that's all I want..." Ali says as she hugs me again.

"Thanks, Al. I love you..." I whisper and hug her tighter.

"Love you too, boo."

And just like that, one of those moments began. We both felt so nice that just stood there like two idiots hugging until the annoying sound of the ringing bell brought us back to our senses.

"Shit! We kinda got caught up in the moment, didn't we?" I chuckle.

"Yeah, a bit..." She says shyly. "Are you feeling better, at least?"

"Yes... A bit... Thank you, Al." I say rubbing my neck.

"Alright, do you think we can go now? Do you want me to come with you?"

"No, don't worry about me. I can take care of myself, you don't need to walk me to my class." I giggle. "You should head to yours asap since we both know how Ms. Davidson is..."

"Yeah, I guess you're right. Well, see you later then, Sammie!"

"See you later!"

After saying goodbye to each other, Alice left the bathroom, but I stayed there a little longer listening to the sound of her heels fading away. After the sound became undetectable, I turned my head to the huge mirror in front of me and stared at myself for a while.

"You can do this. If she says you can, then you can and you will do it for her." I whisper at myself then leave the bathroom, looking at myself one last time and trying to boost my confidence, then head to the class closing the bathroom door behind me. God, I hope the teacher didn't arrive yet.

The rest of the day passed by pretty fast... Maybe too fast. Today we had an important physics test that everyone was worried about. Well, everyone but me. I've never been worried about tests, I always did all I could, but I knew I was too dumb to get a good mark, or at least that's what everyone tells me, especially my parents...

Anyways, as I said, I'm not afraid of the test... The thing I'm always afraid of is when the classes end, and I have to go home... If I can call that a home...

In my opinion, a home is a place where your loved ones are, you get full of joy when you arrive home, and most important... You want to get home as soon as possible.

Well, I forgot how these things feel a long time ago, but I guess life only goes forward, and I have to keep up with it. I just hope that maybe, just maybe, someday Jonah will realize what he's doing to us and will quit his habits... But until then, I hope he won't drink and get as drugged as he usually does, because maybe like this mom will be in a better mood and she won't--

"Hey! How are you feeling about the test, Sammie?" A sweet voice brings me back to my senses in a blink of an eye. It's her, the only person I can lean on in this world and the only one that cares about me. My dear Alice. But I'm not ready to face her... Not yet... "Are you going to say hi to me, at least?" She says in a sad tone, as she gets a bit closer to me and tries to hug me.

"I... I'm sorry, Ali... I just--"

"Stop thinking about this, darling! You've always been the best at physics and we both know that! The bullshit that your mother keeps telling you is just--"

"True?" I interrupt her with my kinda angry response.

"A lie, I wanted to say... "As she said those words, she raised her eyebrow at me and gave me the classic 'stop being insecure and think you dare think that your mom's right' look.

But, sadly, I'm the only one who knows how bad my insecurities can hurt me... And even if her words calmed me a bit, she'll never be able to put my mind at ease for good...

For a few moments, we just stood there, not doing or saying anything, just looking at each other, both unsure of what to say. As always, my incredible amount of 'courage' didn't help me speak, so Alice decided to break the silence speaking again.

"So... Umm... Do you want to come to my place for a few hours? I need a little help with math and I was wondering if you could help me..."

She rubs her neck shyly as she says that and this kinda makes me a little bit confused. She's the confident type, a queen bee, and I sometimes just can't believe that she cared about me that much to let go of this quality of hers just to try to make me feel better.

Oh, shit! Finally processing her words, I realize that This was the last thing I wanted to hear now... I mean, I love helping Al, but everything is getting worse and worse lately... The last time I was 10 minutes late, my mom... Nevermind. I just don't know how to tell her that I can't come to her place without making her hate me... ****.

"Umm... Ali, look, I--" I say barely above a whisper, but, surprisingly, she still manages to hear me. The truth is that I have literally no idea about what I'm supposed to tell her right now...

"It's okay, I understand she doesn't want you to be late..." She interrupts me, letting her head down and lowering her voice on a tone full of sadness and disappointment that made me hate myself for this.

"No, Alice, please, I just... Ugh... It's a bit complicated..." I say as I start rubbing my arm and face away from her. "I'm so sorry... But you can call me and I'll explain everything through the phone if you want."

"No, seriously, Sam, it's fine. I'll figure it out myself... Go now, I don't want you to be late because of me..."

But I don't want to go home...

"I... I'm really sorry, Alice..."

"Bye, Samantha." She says, as she turns around and leaves quickly before I see her crying.

Shit. She called me 'Samantha'. She's so freaking mad at me now... **** my life.

Well, I guess now there's nothing else left to do but to get my backpack and go home. Yaaaaayyyy...

---------------------------------------------------------

After a while, at Samantha's apartment...

(Samantha's POV)

Well, that's it, I'm here, at my so-called "home". God, this seems to get harder and harder every day...

I gently lay my head on the door, trying to hear if they're asleep or not. I hear nothing, so I guess it's my lucky day. I can just go to sleep without any problems tonight.

I'm still very nervous, but it's not like I have any other choice but to enter. So, as my whole body starts to tremble, I try to rotate the key as slow and quiet as I can, hoping that my mom and Jonah won't hear me...

As I enter the living room, I don't see any lights turned on, so yeah, I guess they fell asleep before I came here. But, while I walk in, heading to the corridor that leads to my bedroom, the lights suddenly turn on and I notice her laying on the couch, with her arms crossed over her chest.

We both stare at each other for a few moments as my fear grows more and more until she decides to break the silence, yelling at me:

"Where the **** have you been, slut?"

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