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The Path To Freedom

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part 3

far longer than not, Nikolai has suffered greatly at the hands of the priest

especially because, unlike the others...

he's become aware of the brain washing.

Nikolai

the priest and the other people in the church-

Nikolai

they've hurt me really, really bad

Nikolai

but still i can't help but pray to him...

his eyes turn green

as if someone is controlling his words

"he is our savior after all, he is our guide"

then his eye color turns back to normal

Nikolai

...

Nikolai

no..no, this is wrong!

Nikolai

im supposed to put my trust in Christ!

Nikolai

but..

Nikolai

how do i know??

he tosses his necklace (it was a Cross necklace)

Nikolai

how do i know which thoughts are mine

Nikolai

and which thoughts are planted by him??

"im such a filthy sinner"

he looks at his hands

Nikolai

i don't even know what i believe in anymore...

Nikolai

is god testing me...?

Fyodor just listens to him the whole time. he was concerned for Nikolai

Nikolai

if thats it, maybe god doesn't love me...

Nikolai

well...then-

Nikolai

then I don't like him either!

Nikolai

No...

Nikolai

i- dont wanna feel this way-

Nikolai

make it stop...

Nikolai

im confused

Nikolai

im scared

Nikolai

but i cant trust my feelings either!

Nikolai

the priest- he's m-making them!

Nikolai

He's making them because they're controlling me too!!!

Nikolai

am i nothing more than a vessel

Nikolai

with no free will???

Author

....

Author

extra picture

Author

Author

this was what he looks like while saying that

thanks for supporting btw

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