CHAPTER 3 THE PAST AND THE PRESENT

No matter how hard we try to save things from falling into the other direction, they will! It just isn’t in our hands… And so I struggled night after night trying to pull a decent sleep. After a week, the dream died down. But my hopes of finding my missing piece did not.

I was a tomboy in school and yet secretly hoped that one day somebody would bare their heart out to me, tell me that I was the one they were looking for, their destiny. What I did not know then was that the world is not that small that I would find my exact match in my own school, or my own city or my own country or even in the same body Or was it… It was a question soon to be answered.

So now you know the dream, that dream had nearly made me go cuckoo in the head. I went as far as to question my own sexuality but one thing was clear, I had finally found the reason to that feeling of longing and desperation. And the solution to end all that was to find him, yes I am heterosexual I am clear on that now.

I reached for my phone, he still hadn’t replied to my texts. If he wasn’t responding to my texts despite being online then it means that he is in as much pain as I am, right? He must have not had any food again…the wall between us was an inch higher than yesterday. He does not speak to me anymore, replies to my texts in single word answers and sleeps. Gets up in the morning and leaves for work without any kind of communication. He hasn’t texted me even once on his own which makes my already over-thinking mind into full drive.

You know there are things in life that you know are destined to be doomed yet we put efforts in them because the mere chance of success makes our hearts flutter with joy.I think it’s finally time to tell you another story, a little recent than the last one.

I shall always look back to this story, the story of how two perfect pieces of a puzzle were destroyed to that point that they could never fit together again, or even recognize their own souls again. This story is my love story.

It so happened that before I met this person. The biggest fear of my life had been realised. The fear of being left alone by someone I liked. And this had happened not once but twice already. And at the same time, my career took a major hit. Being a teacher wasn't my first choice you see, I had wanted to be an engineer. Aeronautics. But the financial situation of my family did not allow me to dream that high. So after my bachelor's in social sciences, I prepared for competitive exams to qualify as a teacher in a public school. I failed there as well, again and again. I felt as a total failure, as a daughter, as a student, as a girl and even as a girlfriend.

But as they say when you hit rock bottom, the only way to go is up. And so I went. I stopped worrying and unexpectedly, all my problems solved. one by one.

The day I cleared this exam. I went out with my friends to celebrate.

And that is where I met him.

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