Why is the world so unfair to me?
Why everyone hurts me?
Why do I even exist?
People say everyone existing here has a purpose of life, but what’s my purpose?
Being bullied by others, being their stress reliever, being pitied by everyone, is this for what I have came to Earth?
Tell me what was my fault?
I tried being nice to everyone even though they hurt me several times but still why I’m the one being at fault?
Why God, why? Why do you always make me suffer? Are you even listening to my pleading? Are you even there? Or are you also ignoring me like others?
*chuckles* Maybe, this is my fate! I can’t escape from it. I’m born to be suffered!
“Are you satisfied now?”
Wh-who are you?
“Me? I AM YOU!”
What nonsense are you spouting?!
“I’m just asking whether are you done or not cause I’m tired of listening your sh*t!”
Why do you care huh? If you are tired of listening my sh*t then just go away!
“Come on, if I will go then who is going to pity you?”
I don’t need your pity! I don’t need anyone’s pity! Just scr*m off!
*chuckles* “Aren’t you tired being so pathetic? How long will you just cry? Whenever someone says anything to you, you just shut your mouth. And now you are crying in a dark corner making yourself weak-
Yes I’m weak! Are you satisfied now? I can’t help it! I don’t have courage to face them! Even if I try being strong, at the last I’m the one who is more hurt! I just can’t help it! I don’t know how to fight! I don’t like cursing! I’m not that smart to play wicked tricks like others! I admit that I’m a dumb, useless piece of sh*t who is just existing on this earth!
“No. You are not. You are way more better than you said about yourself. You are a human, not a machine. It’s okay to be imperfect cause no one is perfect in this world. Everyone has flaws but it’s just that some are good at hiding their disadvantages or making them into their advantages. But for that, you need to accept the way you are!”
But I’m too scared! I don’t want to be laughed by others. I don’t like being mocked by them. I don’t want to be clingy on them but still I stick to them. My body isn’t perfect and I’m not pretty either.
“Even if you are beautiful or ugly, your heart must be good. I know it’s hard to accept yourself but that doesn’t mean that you will quit. Just try accepting yourself the way you are. Once you start to love yourself, others opinion won’t matter to you anymore."
But what’s the use if no one will want me? I know that I’m ashamed of myself. I want to change because I want to be accepted by others. I don’t want to be a loner.
*sigh* “But for that, you need to be yourself! Why do you want be the person who you are not? Even if you act like someone else, one day your cover will be blown up right? So don’t you think it’s better to be the person who you exactly are?”
But I don’t want to be hated by everyone. I also want to be myself but my insecurities doesn’t let me.
“It’s okay. Don’t stress yourself. Life is a long journey. You will surely meet someone who will accept the way you are. Who will love you who you exactly are. And always remember, you are not weak. Cause if you were weak then you must not have been surviving till now. Even the person who is going to die have more hope to live than you. So cheer up and smile. Make the sorrow go away. Maybe you can meet that “someone” who is willing to accept you the way you are. And maybe that “someone” can be YOU. “
Me?
“Yes. If you will not love yourself then why are you expecting someone else to love you?”
Maybe you are right. I know it’s hard but still I can try, right?
“Hmm. So try try but don’t cry”
*chuckles*
“Finally you smiled”
You are right. I should cherish myself cause this life is gifted to me. I shouldn’t waste it like this. It was me who made it worse, and now I have to make it better.
“That’s good. “
But who are you?
“You. You’re inner self.”
Huh?
Before he could say anything that figure vanished in thin air making the boy confused and shocked. He shook his head and took a long breathe.
'Whoever you were, thanks for encouraging me. I can’t promise but I will try making myself better. Let’s see what future holds for me. I’m ready to face it...'
P.S.- Thx for reading my nonsense ^ω^
- Your dear author
