"I'll start with—" "shit... Sorry I spilled your coke..."
My eyes twitched. I took a sigh. "It's fine... I don't like it when it's not cold..."
We wasted time cleaning the coke that were spilled on the floor and some of the papers... Why did I have to be partner up with this outcast. Remind you, there's tons of reasons why.
First... She's clumsy, second she looks stupid and she's stupid. Third... We had a history together... When I was just a teenager, her mother was kind enough to let me and my family live with them for temporary.
I never said anything about living in a basement in some rich family that took us... As a teenager... I never really saw the good part, I was only mad and angry when I get to see my mom act like a maid to them... I hated it.
I kept it a secret, instead, I told my classmates that I own the big house, that I was rich... I would tell them stories that I would see from 'her' family to the point that it sounded realistic. Andy was a homeschooler, so she wasn't there with me at school. That's why I get to lie.
Not until... She suddenly came to school. But she never said anything. She even ended up as my classmate, people would talk about me being rich and owning a big house. She would hear about it... But she wouldn't say anything either. I was relief... But I only get to see the bad side... Because deep inside... I hate myself more than anything. I was insecure...
I was embarrassed at first, but it became normal for me to go home with her, without her asking me about why I was lying. And maybe I was too contented... But no matter how poor your life is... Or how unlucky you are, in the end, karma goes to anybody. People are equal in nature after all.
One day, I was absent because I was sick, I didn't know that at school there was this project that involves groupings, it's one of those type of project that involves creating it together at someone's house. They chose hers. I still couldn't go to school that time, and out of nowhere... They got inside the house.
I was upstairs, hiding... I can hear them asking my mother to grab them a drink... Laughing behind her...
I was about to go downstairs... Even though I look like shit... Because my eyes were red from crying...
Yet I heard her... She told them to leave.
Though that time... I didn't know that she didn't decided to do the project at her house, she was forced to.
"Why did you let them do the project at your house?" I ask... Tears spilling down my cheeks, but I was clenching my fist... It was clear I was angry at her... Though I was only angry at myself.
"I... I—"
Then just like that... I throw a glass of water at her... My mom saw it... The juice she's holding in a glass jar dropped from her grip...
Andy's mother didn't kicked us out... My mom just took me and my sister and left herself... Though Andy's mom was telling her that it's alright, my mom insist.
The next family we were able to live with... Was awful... That's where I realized everything.
Mom met a decent guy... They fell in love and got married. That's where everything was getting better. I made sure to do my best at school. Do my best at everything. Now I'm in collage.
And just when I thought I accepted myself... Or that I learned... It just an illusion that I made up... To make myself feel better. Because the moment I saw her... Everything came back. I was liar... I was even able to lie at myself.
I still hate her, I know it's selfish... But... Fuck...
She's still the same as ever. She never said anything... Nothing at all. And that did something to me... It made my insecurities burn again...
The life I've been forgetting... Could easily come back because of her... She could just say one word... And that's it.
I'm scared of her. I made sure she had a hard time socializing... I made sure she wouldn't be able to talk to anyone that much. I made sure to stay away.
And yet here I am.
"I'll buy you a new one..." She said...
I shake my head, gripping the pen I'm holding. "You really don't have to..." I told her...
"I'm sorry... I always fuck everything up when I'm with you." She said, I froze, I didn't want to look at her or respond to that... I have no Idea why... But my eyes landed at her, she's looking down... I can only see that stupid bangs covering her eyes...
She have a nice hair color... It used to be ginger, but now... It's orange, she probably colored it that way... It has different shades of orange... Dark... Light—
"I like you."
I froze... The pen dropped from my hand, there was this mild earthquake underneath me... Or at least that's how it felt, because I feel like my heart could ripped out of my chest right now...
Stupid... Stupid...
"Forget I said that... Fuck..." She said looking away... The edge of her ear peaked out, it was in a shade of pink... And probably my cheeks are in a shade of red...
Stupid...
*Four years ago*
At Andy's house at the basement (where Jane used live when she was fifteen years old.)
The only light was the lamp, creating a shadow of a two girls that just kissed
Of course Jane pulled away first... Even though she's the one who grabbed Andy's soaked shirt to pull her close.
"Wh-what was that?..." Andy asked... Confused.
"My way of... Apologies... For throwing the water at you..."
Andy suddenly let out a laugh.
"Apology accepted..."
"Stupid..."
"H-huh?..."
The history we had together was that moment at the basement.
Yes I hate her. So what? You can hate and love at the same time.
*Present*
"This reminds me of that time..." She whispered... Her breath brushing against my lips... She's so close...
"What do you mean?" I asked pulling away a little. "When you were taking my shirt off? Because it soaked? Except... Right now it's not." She replied...
Goddamnit...
