There he stood, with his emotionless face radiating nothing but coldness. What's he thinking? I'm dying to know.
Heh, quite funny when I'm actually dying. I shake violently, coughing up more blood as they spill to the ground. The grasses couldn't get redder from all this blood. I didn't like it, the sight before me, it caused me discomfort.
It scared me.
Also funny, red used to be my favorite colour...
I would've giggled at this moment if it wasn't for the pain the arrow in my back was causing me. The other bruises across my body also weren't helping. The sound of grass crunching brought my attention back to the man, the man I love.
His fake face falters as he nears me, now filled with remorse. Oh, how much it hurt to see him like this. After all, I was the reason he was hurting. Fate can be cruel sometimes. Crouching before me, he pulled my bloodied figure into his lap and broke down into tears.
"I'm sorry... I-I couldn't protect you..." He struggled to talk, tears running down his face like a waterfall. I don't know what hurt more, my injury, or my heart. I wanted to hold him, wipe all his tears, just talk like we used to. But why can't I move? Despite how much I want to, I can't move a single limb. What happened to the quote "If there's a will, there's a way."? Is it my punishment for my sins? Then, it really is a suitable punishment...
The perfect punishment for a traitor.
"Sh-shhh… It's not your fault… It was your duty… to fight for your clan. You did great by the way, good job soldier." I tried to laugh but a groan came out of my mouth instead.
Ahh, now he's gonna feel worse, all because of me...
I'm really such a bad person.
None of us said a word as we stayed on the bloody ground, smell of blood and flesh heavy from the battle that just ended. Oh, did I mention I was in a battlefield, and surrounded by bodies? No? Uh, now you know. There was a battle between the two most powerful clans in the kingdom, and we just happened to be from opposite ones... Fate really is cruel sometimes, huh?
Why us though? Did it really have to be us? Why were we from different clans? Why did there have to be a war?
My foggy mind understood none of it, nor did it find any answers. The only thing it desires now is rest. It's time to rest, I've given my all, I deserve it now.
"James?" I opened my mouth, my voice barely audible, and raspy. I hope he didn't think it was a monster talking... Ah, look at me, joking at a time like this. I guess I never was the serious type, taking things seriously... hurt me a lot.
"Y-yes?" He hurriedly leaned over to hear me better, his soft hair brushing my cheek. I'd always brush his hair when we used to meet up secretly. It's so messy now... Who'd take care of his hair if I'm not here?
"Take care of yourself, okay?" I managed to successfully smile this time. "Marietta... Please... Don't go....."
And I thought my heart couldn't hurt more.
Suddenly, he tries to pick me up but I was quick to stop him. "James... Stop. Listen to me. You... have your sword right?" I've decided, what I want in my last moments, and what I'll say as my last words.
"Mari please....." He kept begging but I didn't budge, it was for our own good. This pain was too much, both in my back and in my heart.
"Listen, I can't talk much... I love you so much, remember that okay? Just... Don't fall for someone you can't get again, promise?" I said with a hint of sarcasm in my voice. He, however, remained silent. "Hey...?" I asked after a moment to gain his attention.
Ah, I wanted to say many more things but I don't think I'll make it, so better say the most important words.
"Hm?" He hummed, voice slightly cracking. "I want you to end my misery now, it's hurting too much." I finally spoke the words he dreaded, his emotions were clear on his face. His head fell on his chest, but when it rose I could see he has accepted the harsh reality, which I did long ago.
"Can you smile for me?" He did as I asked, forcefully giving a smile as he picked up his sword. "And where's my goodbye kiss?" I said with a slight smirk.
He chuckled a little. Mission accomplished, no more jokes needed.
Then we kissed, for the last time. Still, it felt like the very first time, sending a burning sensation stronger than the one in my back. At least, my last moments were satisfying, eh?
"I love you, Marietta," he said pulling back and raising his sword.
"I love you too, James," I whispered weakly, my power on the verge of leaving.
"....Goodbye."
"This isn't goodbye, I'll forever watch over you... You just...won't see me...." He didn't make a sound, probably started crying like a baby again...
I close my eyes, a smile playing on my lips. I was always afraid of death. But as a person who's going to go through it now, it's not so bad. I'm satisfied with my life, with no regrets. I'm ready to leave.
"I'm ready."
And with a single swing of a sword, my pain finally ended. I was, finally, free.
----------------
"Then the sinner was finally free, from all the earthly pains," a woman said.
"Whaaat? She died?" a little girl sat beside the woman, her expression saddened.
"No, she lived forever in the heart of her lover."
"Woah, I want a lover now also..."
"No, you're too young!"
"Okay okay, I know....."
"But I'm sure you'll find someone like that one day! Just, not now..."
"Yay~ I'll be waiting~"
FIN
[This is part of my short story series "The world inside my mind". If you like it, kindly check out my whole book. Your support is my biggest motivation. 💙]
