Maybe I'm overreacting to this idrk.... in my childhood, all I remember when I was in my home was, the curtains always being closed. it was dark and I would always hear the children outside playing. I'd be jealous yk.
my mom always at work or school. my dad always in bed. it was lonely.... whenever I'd get in trouble I would be called stupid, dumb.... I would be told that they're doing that because they love me....
it stopped once my dad started to go to work and my mom stayed home. it was all good, there was light and I didn't have to make myself ramen noodles whenever I was hungry. it was..... good
that is.... until corona hit. it wasn't bad at first but then my dad got sick, so if we did anything to upset him, he would use that excuse to yell at us and ask us if we wanted to die or something.... it was bad. I didn't cry because I was disappointed in myself, no, I was crying because I was scared of the yelling.
I'm not a fan of loud noises depending on what it is. like if you dropped something, I'll instantly think "oh shit, we're gonna get in trouble now" because when I was younger that is what would happen. yelling. I'm a sensitive person, so any yelling I'll start to tear up. it's stupid ik. the door slamming, I'll think you're mad at me. not saying goodbye to me, I'll think u hate me. but that's just me....
I'm scared of yelling because that's all I remember when I was younger. when I was with my parents. it was mostly because I was naughty, but sometimes, because of how stress they were, they would take out there anger on us.
but that's my childhood. tnx for listening to my vent 😕😕
