"...Director. Don't tell me it was you...." "...Me? What do you mean by that?"
The cold air was exhaled as I asked him again. I didn't get what he meant. As soon as I realized it, my head started to spin.
"...Director".
"Are you suspecting me?"
'I was annoyed by Kim Yu-Hwa's existence, so I planned an unforeseen accident to get rid of him.' That's what it looks like to him. It seems that Yoon Heegyeom was forcing an answer out of me. Suspicion...
Back then, when I invested in his movie with bad intentions, bought him a house, or did anything to help him, he never showed any suspicion towards me. On the other hand, I've always doubted Yoon Heegyeom and tried very hard to read his actions. The fact that Yoon Heegyeom was suspicious of me made me feel strange... It was different from the feeling of anger, sadness, or misery.
"If I said it wasn't me, can you trust my words?" "Yes, I trust you." 44 "
Surprisingly, his answer was different from what I felt. "I believe you." He said he would trust my words. To be honest, I wasn't convinced by what he said. In fact, I couldn't believe his explanation at all. I once suspected that he knew what I had done to him and even judged that he was feigning ignorance and putting up an act. Besides, it's not like I've never thought that Yoon Heegyeom might also doubt me. I was also wondering if he was wary of me. There were times when I was worried about it.
But feeling it first hand being suspicious of someone I love was far and much more painful than I thought. It felt like I was being dragged into mud and couldn't help but fall into a bottomless, black pit.
"Well...".
I felt really...dirty.
It was just yesterday when I realized that I couldn't let him go and let all my emotions slip away. When he held me in his arms and kissed me, the feelings that had been bothering me all along disappeared so easily. The desire to have him dominated everything, so I thought nothing else mattered.
How can it be that it was less than a day? Again...I was agonizing. It was ridiculous
that Yoon Heegyeom was pointing a hand at me for what happened to Kim
Yu-Hwa. Is it anger against Yoon Heegyeom? No. It was anger towards me. I was
the one who created a situation where he couldn't help but doubt me.
"Yoon Heegyeom, believe in what you want to believe. It's up to you."
My heart was breaking, so I couldn't speak much. A shadow covered Yoon
Heegyeom's face. Thus I couldn't see it well. I didn't even know what he was
thinking. Shit, I've decided not to think about it because I couldn't help but love Yoon Heegyeom. I promised myself to put him as my priority... But It was also very difficult for me not to be cautious given the situation. Nothing was easy.
As my eyes were getting hotter, something filled up. Honestly, it was better to shed tears, but the tears didn't come out no matter how I wished for. I really wanted to cry at that moment.