Her mother was right.

Lara should have listened to her mother when she told her to choose another man besides that prince. If she were to pick the name of a stupid woman who had ruined her own life because of a man, then Lara would pick her own name without any hesitation. A round tear mark had spread over the letter that began with “Dear Mother”.

“Dear Mother”; The words that she had never once said ever since she grew up. Lara thought to herself that this letter would be her last will. Today was the day that she had died, and, somewhere, her mother would listen to the news of her daughter’s death.

Will she be sad?

Will she cry?

Lara would never know.

Lara had been ignoring her mother for too long, this would be her first and last letter to her. She was regretting everything—loving the prince and giving him her whole life, becoming a doll full of lies and pretending to be nice, and eventually, dying without even getting to rebel properly.

[Seeking forgiveness, Lara]

Lara scribbled her name on top of the letter.

Tears flowed again. She quickly raised her head and glared at the ceiling, it was a useless act. Hot tears flowed through the corner of her eyes, passed by her temple, and went to her ears.

“Saintess, you need to go out now.”

The knight commander approached her and reached out his hand to her.

“…Wait a minute.”

Lara wiped her tears and organized the paper on the desk, along with the pencil she was holding. She did something that could have been done by a servant as if she was trying to avoid her death by delaying the time. Seeing Lara, who even tried to organize the ink bottle herself, the knight commander urged her.

“You’re running out of time.”

Lara stared at his hand and gently put her hand on top of his.

“Can you deliver this letter for me?”

“Yes.”

“What about Prince Sidhar?”

“He’s waiting for you outside.”

The knight commander grabbed her hand and led the way. When she came out of the hallway and looked out the window, she could see an altar in the middle of

the vast square. Countless people gathered in front of the altar, spitting out screams of madness.

“Consecrate the saintess!”

“Kill her!”

“Throw her to the demon!”

Their voices shook the square. The demon wants the saintess. It suddenly appeared and burned half of the Western Hautean in one day. It was terribly strong and cruel. The people who were horror-struck constantly prayed in front of the royal palace and the temple—asking to be saved, wailing that they didn’t want to die.

Then, a rumor began to circulate from someone.

“Everything will be solved if the saintess is offered to the demon.”

There was no need for the temple to take action.

Lara’s sacrifice was a matter of course because she was the saintess of Hautean. Because she was a noble, benevolent, and kind woman like an angel. Because that was how she was made to be.

Kind? Me?

Lara looked back on her life and laughed while twisting her lips. Those people were being fooled. The saintess was a fake. There was no such thing as a saintess in this land in the first place. She was just a delusion created by Prince Sidhar, who coveted the throne. She was just a mere supporting actor in the screenplay that the temple had devised and directed with Prince Sidhar.

Lara strode down the dark hallway and halted her steps. At the end of the hallway, golden hair drenched in the sunshine stood out outside the wide-open door.

‘It’s the main actor.’

Sidhar Hautean—the man Lara loved so much.

Their eyes met.

He looked gaunt at first glance. Despair could be seen on his dry eyes and grief was on his rough lips. Of course, one needs to be that good at acting to be the main character of the story.

“Son of a b*tch.”

With an accurate and correct pronunciation, Lara uttered a vulgar curse at him. The knight commander shuddered. The saintess he knew was so elegant and noble that she was never the one to speak such vulgar language.

Lara left the knight commander who was frozen in the shade of the dark hallway and came outside.

It was a damn sunny day. Her white dress fluttered softly. Her long, charming hair was loosened like a skein of thread, flowing up and down.

“Are you satisfied now?”

“Lara.”

“What would happen to you after I die? Are you going to be a prince who is sad after losing his lover? Or… are you going to be an epic hero who overcomes his grief and defeats the demon?”

Lara asked him with her teeth clenched.

A moment of irritation passed by the prince’s face, which seemed like he was about to shed tears in sorrow. His eyes moved slowly. Looking at the crowd gathering like dark clouds in the distance, Prince Sidhar slowly opened his mouth.

“My dear, my love.”

“Until the very end…”

As she was about to shout something out of anger, Prince Sidhar knelt toward her. Very slowly, as if he was asking the people to look at him. He knelt on the cold ground and lay down with his hands on the floor. It was a low position, always done by the slaves. And as if that was not enough, the prince bowed deeply towards Lara and even kissed the tip of her dress. The buzzing noises stopped. The square was filled with silence.

The great royal family kissed the feet of the saintess to save the kingdom. He left a tearful kiss at the feet of his lover who tried to sacrifice herself for the kingdom.

…That’s what everyone thought.

“Lara, we’ve talked about this.”

Because they could not listen to what the prince talked about.

“Just shut your mouth and die. You’re not even a saintess. You’ve been living in luxury as the lover of the prince and as the one and only saintess. Wasn’t that enough already?”

“Sidhar.”

“I love you. I told you that every time you wanted it. I love you. You’re really beautiful. Perfect. Should I say it even more?”

“Shut up.”

“Be nice. You know that I can drag you like a dog. Lara, you have done well all this time. Now that it’s time for you to die, you should also die like a saintess. Okay?”

“Hah.”

She had already had enough. Nothing good would come if she kept on enduring. She did not even have any more tears to be shed. Lara took a deep breath. She gave strength to her trembling fingertips and dominated her throbbing heart.

“Your Highness.”

She was smiling. Though it was not the usual elegant smile, she tried hard to smile nonetheless.

“You shouldn’t have betrayed me.”

Lara dug up her last remaining courage. Her hands, which were buried in her long, heavy dress, moved quickly. Her white fingers wrapped around a black glass bottle. It was the ink bottle.

“Lara!”

Sensing the ominousness, Prince Sidhar shouted and tried to make a move. But it was already too late. As soon as Lara drank the black liquid in the bottle, black and red blood poured out of her mouth. The same happened to her nose, ears, and eyes. Her body melted from the inside.

“Call, call the priest!”

Prince Sidhar’s face, which was covered in the blood that Lara had vomited, was horribly distorted. Watching his mask, which was close to perfection, be shattered to pieces was a much better pleasure than she had imagined.

It hurt. It was so painful that she could not even scream. It felt like her whole body was burning and her soul was torn to pieces. But it was fine. Because she knew this was not the end.

Lara.

Or Laviore Ria Bailey. The one and only saintess in Hautean, and the eternal lover who was chosen by the prince. The woman, who was complimented by everyone to live happily for a long time, like the main character in a fairy tale.

That was how she died.

After her death, Lara didn’t know whether everyone had lived happily ever after, or suffered and walked the path of destruction. She was not curious about it, nor could she even ask anyone, and most of all, it was none of her business anymore.

After a long bout of terrible pain, Lara opened her eyes and found herself soaking in the hot tub in her room. The last sensation she had felt before she died was a tremendous pain that was enough to melt her guts. And so, before she could even come to her senses, she had convulsions all over her body.

Splash!

Her thin arms and legs floundered in the bathtub, not even affording to scream. After swallowing plenty of fragrant water, Lara crawled out of the bathtub on all fours with tears and snot pouring out.

Huff. Huff.

The water was hot, the steam was blurry, and the floor was cold.

Her fingertips trembled.

When she lay down and scratched the floor, Lara had felt another sensation, one that was different than pain—the sensation of rubbing the smooth tiles, the damp water, the slipperiness of the fragrant oil, and the scent of lilies lingering at the end of her nose.

She had come back.

The realization struck Lara like lightning.

This was the bathroom attached to the room she used as a teenager. This breathtaking scent of lilies was also popular at that time. Her nails were round, and the ring mark that had remained like a tattoo on her finger was nowhere to be seen. Even the smudges of ink that were on her fingers seemed to be missing.

She had come back to the past.

Lara stood up slowly against the bathroom wall. She was still dizzy from the aftermath of the pain, but she forced herself to get up and walked in front of the mirror. When she wiped the foggy mirror that was full of steam with her palm, a girl with familiar features was looking at her.

“Hah.”

She let out a dry chuckle.

“I will give you a second chance.”

Lara heard that voice on the day it was decided that she would be sacrificed.

When she was pouring out tears of resentment and sorrow at the prince, questioning the reason she was abandoned and betrayed, the voice appeared and whispered affectionately.

“I will give you a chance to turn back everything and make it right.”

Lara had no way of knowing whether it was the words of the divine god or the temptation of the nasty devil. In fact, it was more like it didn’t matter to her.

She was sad, desperate, and above all, madly enraged.

“Please give me the chance.”

So Lara accepted the chance.

She took the second chance without knowing what she needs to offer in return, and without knowing whether the existence was that of the divine or the demonic.

She did not care even if she lost her soul. She was fine even if she needed to suffer for eternity.

If only she could turn back the time.

“I will do everything.”

She would never cling to the prince again. No matter how sweet his voice entices her, she won’t listen. She will spit at his face and scoff at his slick serpent-like tongue.

And more importantly, she had to correct all her mistakes.

Lara, who was ignorant, did whatever the prince asked her to do. Without knowing that the prince and the temple had conspired with the dark wizards, she sided with them. She played a part in banishing the innocent princess, and she stirred up bad blood between the empire and the king of the lawless zone, so much so that they had waged war against each other. She kept the good people away and kept the bad people close. She only chose what she wanted to hear.

The villainess with a façade of a saintess. It was only natural that those who were beside her became unlucky. And now, Lara decided to live a second life to make everything right.

***

Laviore Ria Bailey.

Amazingly, Lara was born with the same face as her mother.

Her father, Marquess Bailey, was the most good-looking guy of the century with his white hair, light blue eyes, pale skin, and grim-looking face.

On the other hand, her mother, Marchioness Bailey looked cold and fierce. Lara was the spitting image of her mother, she looked like a girl who was too difficult to approach.

She used to hate it.

If she looked like her father, she would have grown up hearing that she was as beautiful as an angel. She would have the prince’s love all to herself. Why did she have to look like her mother and go take the easy path the hard way?

Or at least, that was what she used to think.

Lara was young and immature.

So she considered his father, who often brought pretty clothes and expensive accessories for her, as a good parent who loved her. And she believed that her mother, who was busy and inattentive, to be a bad parent and did not love her.

Because she did not know anything back then.

Contrary to his good look, Marquess Bailey was a greedy, despicable man. It was a piece of cake for him to use his child as a tool to realize his desires.

“Be nice.”

“Don’t open your eyes like that. Always look down. Don’t make any noise when you laugh.”

“Wear a white dress. Don’t show your skin. The prince likes a well-behaved, quiet lady.”

Lara did as her father told. She tried to be the nicest and most decent lady in the world. Only then would the prince look at her. She dyed her hair and eyebrows so they would be blurry. She took much trouble straightening her curly hair every day. She powdered her skin to be pale and white, and she drew her eyes drooping.

After starving herself to get a thin body, she always wore a white dress. Even if there was an emergency, she would never run, and she always talked as if she was whispering. She could not even get mad or blame anyone. She didn’t covet or desire anything.

That was how she lived while losing herself.

“That was crazy.”

Lara looked in the mirror while holding a twisted smile. The girl who was once called an angel was gone. Her reflection in the mirror was so different that she felt like she was looking at someone else. Her slightly slanted upward eyes looked arrogant and sharp like a cat. Her jaws were lean, but the tip of her nose was round, making it difficult to guess her age. She would look like she was angry if she didn’t smile because of her stiff mouth and slightly protruding lips.

Curly hazel hair, intense scarlet eyes, and provocative eyes were all her original look.

“Milady! Are you still not done?”

As Lara carefully observed herself in the mirror, a maid with a loud voice called her from outside the bathroom.

It was Konny.

Among all the maids who attended Lara, she was the only one who hated Prince Sidhar. Konny was very unhappy when Lara became the prince’s puppet. And when Lara decided to follow Prince Sidhar to the royal palace, Konny cried and held on to her not to go.

“Milady, if the prince really loves you, he won’t force you to be a lady that fits his preference from head to toe. I know I’m crossing the line, but this is really weird. I’m seriously so worried about you!”

Because Konny was a girl who could not lie and was always honest in everything, she gathered her courage to tell only the truth.

But on that day, Lara burned with rage.

She turned her back on Konny, who had been like her friend since her childhood. She chased away the kind maid who was crying and clinging to her.

“Konny.”

When Lara opened the bathroom door and came out, Konny stretched out her lips and sighed.

“Milady, you soaked yourself for too long.”

The way she spoke was not very sweet, but she acted fast. Konny wiped the remaining water off Lara’s body with a large towel and quickly dressed her up.

Konny spoke sternly.

“I know it’s still summer. But I already told you not to stay in the bathtub for too long. You are going to catch a cold. Huh? Milady, why are you shaking? Are you not feeling well?”

The aftermath of the pain remained and made her body shiver. Lara tried to smile but it did not work out. Her stiff face twisted as if she was going to cry.

“Are you cold? I knew this would happen! Should I bring your gown?”

“I’m fine.”

“What’s wrong, milady? What happened? Did someone say something to you? What’s wrong with your face?”

Konny asked anxiously. Her round eyes reflected her sorrow for Lara.

Yes, this is how she was like.

If Lara had a dark expression, then Konny would easily notice it, she would come asking what was wrong and who had done it.

Konny was the only maid of the House of Bailey who really liked Lara. Lara wanted to apologize to Konny, but it would make Konny more worried. So, she just stretched out her arms and hugged her. Konny’s small body, which had been moving tirelessly, came into Lara’s arms.

“Miladyyyy?!”

It was the first time Lara had done anything like this. Now that she had hugged her, Konny was much smaller than Lara had thought. She had always thought that Konny looked like a squirrel, but she really was as small and soft as a squirrel.

Lara quickly thought of something more fitting than saying she missed her.

“Thanks.”

She whispered.

After saying that to Konny’s ear, she hugged her tightly.

“Urgh, milady, I can’t breathe.”

Now that she was holding Konny like that, she came to the realization that she really had returned to the past. Her shivering had also gradually subsided. Lara only let go of her arms after Konny’s face turned red.

“Have you just read a flirtatious novel? What’s wrong with my lady today?”

Konny made a fuss saying she got goosebumps. But even though she criticized her and asked the reason why Lara suddenly did that, Konny was smiling with her face flushing red.

It was a hot summer. The cicada’s cry was loud. While brushing her wet hair, Lara approached the window and opened it.

A warm breeze blew in.

The being who sent Lara back to the past did not tell her exactly at what point in time she would go. She knew it was before she entered the royal palace, but she had to rely on speculation for the exact point. Since her eyebrows and hair were not dyed yet, it must have been before she had a relationship with the prince.

“Konny.”

“Yes, milady.”

“What’s the date today? What happened to my coming-of-age ceremony?”

Lara asked. She was born in summer and her portrait was sent to the prince after the ceremony.

“It was a mess. Lord Bailey was busy forming a faction, Lady Bailey did not even come, and none of milady’s friends attended, only His Lordship’s guests filled the party…”

That meant it had not been long since her coming-of-age ceremony had been held.

Have they sent my portrait?

Have I met the prince?

Lara, who was calmly racking her brain, turned her head toward Konny.

“What about my mother?”

There was impatience in Lara’s voice. Her mother left the house around this time. It happened so long ago that she could not remember the day. It might have already been too late.

Marchioness of Bailey was infamous for not getting along with her husband, Marquess of Bailey. If one were to choose the couple with the worst relationship in the Hautean social circle, anyone would point to them. Even though they lived in the same house, they did not even see each other. The husband who looked down on his wife and the wife who despised her husband—they were the embodiment of a broken family.

They began to officially live separately starting from Lara’s coming-of-age ceremony. To be exact, it was right to say that Marchioness of Bailey left the mansion and began living alone.

“Konny, what about my mother? Where is she? Has she left already?”

“I heard she is leaving soon.”

“Soon?”

“Yes, the servants will start loading the wagon after breakfast.”

It was today.

Her memories flooded in all at once. On this day, even though Lara knew her mother was leaving the house, she had turned a blind eye and just stayed in her room. Because she thought her mother had abandoned her. Lara shouted to her that she would never call her mother again and even declared they were strangers from that day onwards.

Just because her mother lived separately from her.

Her mother had endured as hard as she could. Being away from her father did not mean that her mother was abandoning her. It was thanks to hundreds of letters from her mother that Lara was able to endure in her right mind until before she died. It was just a short letter asking about Lara’s well-being and telling Lara how she was doing, but despite that, her worries towards Lara can be felt in each word.

Why didn’t I know that?

Every time she recalled that her first reply to her mother was her will, Lara came to hate herself. If she had known this, she would have asked God to return her to the time before her parents got married. She could tell her mother not to marry that bastard because he was a son of a b*tch and not to give birth to someone like Lara. She would tell her to just live alone, go far away, and be happy.

Even though that would mean that Lara would not have been born, her mother would have been much better off like that. She would not have had to suffer the misfortune of having to live in the same house with a husband that she loathed, nor would she have to worry herself and endure that kind of life because of her child. She could have lived a free and wonderful life, more than anyone else. Because her mother was the coolest and most capable woman Lara ever knew.

“Konny.”

“Yes, milady.”

“Let’s go to mother.”

“Right now?”

Lara jumped up from the chair and grabbed the hem of her skirt with one hand. Then, she walked out of the drawing-room with a quick step.

“Milady, wait for me!”

Konny hurriedly followed behind Lara.

∘₊✧──────✧₊∘

When Lara came outside, the servants who had finished their meals gathered and were loading the wagon.

‘I have to meet mother.’

Lara took a deep breath. Her palms were slippery with sweat. Her lips that used to be fine even when she swallowed the poison, were all dried up. She was wondering whether this was a good thing or she was just making trouble. Lara wiped her palm on her skirt and looked at the other side of the main building.

“Milady, Her Ladyship is coming.”

Lara’s mother, Isadora Bailey. Isadora walked fast with her thin brown hair neatly tied up. Heavy fatigue could be seen on her sharp face. With a heavy briefcase in one hand, she hurriedly ordered her secretary who followed her closely.

Isadora was the same in Lara’s memory. The top wealthy merchant in Hautean, who was more well known with the nickname ‘Thousand Gold Isadora’ than Marchioness of Bailey. Her mother was always busy. In Lara’s memory, Isadora was always holding documents in one hand. There was never a day where she slept early or overslept.

When the scale of her business reached the empire beyond the Kingdom of Hautean, Isadora—who used to be a commoner—had been misunderstood as having bought her husband with gold because she wanted to be a noblewoman.

“…Mother.”

Lara murmured.

Her voice was so small that it did not even reach Konny who was next to her, let alone Isadora.

She was afraid.

Although Lara was always the one who turned away and hated her mother, she was afraid that her mother would react the same way. If she could, she wanted to beg for forgiveness for all the mistakes she had done in the past. But thinking that her mother did not know anything, she felt even more guilty.

In the meantime, Isadora had already arrived in front of the carriage. Isadora threw her heavy bag into the carriage, grabbed her skirt, and put one foot on the foothold. Looking from behind, she did not seem to have any lingering feelings left.

‘No.’

Lara decided not to hesitate any longer. If she let her mother go like this, she would regret it once again.

“Mother!”

Lara began to run. Like Isadora, she grabbed her skirt and ran without hesitation towards her.

“Milady!”

Konny was surprised and called out to Lara. All the servants who were carrying the luggage were looking at her. Isadora was almost on the carriage.

“Mother, wait!”

Lara arrived before the door closed when Isadora had just lifted her right leg from the foothold. In a hurry, Lara did not even realize what she had grabbed. She only thought to block the door from being closed.

Of all things, she just had to grab Isadora’s right foot with both her hands. The soft socks and hard shoes were in Lara’s hands. Clinging to her mother’s foot, Lara’s face flushed red in an instant. It was an absurd moment, even for Isadora, whose leg was caught. As she tried to get into the carriage, she turned her head back to check Lara’s face and lifted her thin eyebrows.

“…Lara?”

What are you doing now?

Why are you here?

Why are you holding on to my leg?

Lots of questions could be seen on Isadora’s face.

I was wrong.

Please don’t abandon me.

I will get my act together and listen to you.

So please don’t go and stay with me.

Lara was going to say that. She thought that was the correct answer. But at that moment, she suddenly had another thought.

Should I really hold onto her?

Is this the correct thing to do?

This was something that mother has been thinking about for a long time, so is it okay to act as I please like this?

Has there ever been a moment where mother was happy in this house?

Lara shook her head. No matter how hard she thought about it, this did not seem to be the correct answer. She had sworn to change. She was determined to correct the wrong things. Even though she was lucky to return to when she was 19 years old, she was still an adult who had already lived for 28 years.

So she had to find a better way.

“Mother.”

There was something that Lara really wanted to say to her mother after she came back to the past. She thought about when and how to bring it up, but there was no need to think about it anymore.

The perfect time was now.

“Get a divorce from father.”

Lara said.

How unhappy it must have been for two people who hated each other to need to live in the same house and had to face each other every day. Lara knew how terrible her father was. And now that she knew her mother’s choice was right, she wanted to help her mother get away from her father. At the very least, she did not want to be a shackle to her mother.

So she said it firmly.

“Get a divorce.”

Isadora did not give her answer. She was just squinting and observing Lara’s face for a long time.