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Love Or Lust

Chapter One — The Night They Keep Returning To

The clock read 2:11 a.m. when Mara gave up on sleep.

The city’s hum was faint beyond her apartment’s thin walls, a low vibration against her skin. The room was bathed in that particular kind of night-shadow that made everything softer, yet more dangerous—like secrets murmured in the dark.

Her phone screen lit up before she touched it.

Riven.

The name alone was enough to tighten something in her chest. He always found her at this hour, like he could smell her insomnia from miles away.

Couldn't sleep? Or do you wait for me to start typing?

His words appeared like they did every night: unexpected, inevitable.

Mara’s lips twitched. She typed back without really thinking.

Does it matter? You always find me in the dark, anyway.

She could almost picture his smile—sharp, deliberate, a mouth made for both promises and threats.

It’s where we belong, isn’t it? What are you thinking about?

Her fingers hesitated over the glowing keyboard. She could lie. She often did, with other people. But not with him.

Whether it’s love... or just lust that keeps me coming back.

There was a pause she could feel more than see. Then his reply hit her like a whisper pressed to her ear.

What difference does it make, Mara? When you ache for my touch, do you want answers or abandon?

Her pulse skipped. She hated that he could do this—reduce her to heat and want with nothing but words.

I want you. Is that wrong?

Wrong things feel the best, Mara. Just like last night.

A shiver curved down her spine, memories mingling with fresh heat: the weight of his hands, the way his presence left her both bruised and addicted.

I remember every bruise. Every mark you left.

You let me. You liked it.

Did I ever say no?

You don’t have to. Your silence is louder than screams.

Her breath caught at the truth of it. Silence had always been her confession.

Don’t pretend you’re not obsessed.

Obsession is the only true passion, Mara. Love is for the daylight—We thrive in shadows.

Her eyes roamed across the dimly lit room. Shadows clung to everything; maybe that’s why she couldn’t tell where he ended and she began.

So this… us… Is it love or lust?

Both. The line vanished the night you whispered for more.

Her thighs dared to press together. The memory wasn’t distant—it was in her muscles, her blood, in the way she was already unable to breathe slowly.

If I told you to stop?

I’d stop touching your body. But never your mind.

And if I told you not to stop?

There it was: the smile she couldn’t see but always felt.

I’d ruin you for anyone else.

Her heart kicked hard. She should have stopped. Instead:

You already have.

The typing bubble appeared again. And this time, it came with a promise.

Tomorrow night. Meet me where the city forgets itself.

She stared at it, fighting herself and losing.

I’ll be there. And I won’t pretend to want anything less than the darkness you offer.

Even in text, she could feel his satisfaction.

Then prepare yourself. Because after tomorrow, you’ll never be able to tell love from lust again.

Mara put her phone down but didn’t close her eyes.

Sleep wasn’t coming—and tomorrow night couldn't come fast enough.

The worst part?

She didn’t know whether she wanted to find love in him… or to be consumed completely by something far darker

Chapter Two — Where the City Forgets Itself

The night wrapped around them like a velvet curtain, heavy and thick with possibility. The distant sounds of the city were muted here—no cars rushing by, no chatter or neon lights glaring. Just the persistent hush of darkened streets and the soft rustle of their breaths mingling between them.

Mara’s heart beat in a tumultuous rhythm, echoing louder than the stillness around her. She was acutely aware of every sensation—her skin alive where the cold bit, the heat radiating from Riven’s nearness, and the silent, magnetic pull drawing them together like two halves of something fractured and desperate.

Riven’s gaze was intense, hungry yet tender as it followed every flicker of emotion crossing her face. His fingers, long and confident, reached out with a feather-light touch, tracing the delicate curve of her jaw. The contact was electric—soft enough to soothe, sharp enough to ignite a storm beneath her skin.

“Look at me,” he murmured, voice low and steady, the words threading through the space between them like a vow.

Mara lifted her eyes to meet his, and something unspoken passed in that moment: a raw, aching longing not just for touch, but for understanding, for an escape from loneliness that had settled deep inside her. She saw in his eyes the same hunger, the same yearning for something more than fleeting encounters or hollow promises.

“I’m here,” she whispered, barely daring to breathe.

His lips curled into a faint, knowing smile—one that promised both danger and sanctuary. “Not just here,” he said, “but with you. Fully.”

The silence that followed was thick with meaning. Mara’s body hummed with anticipation, her every nerve ending awakened. She could feel the strength of his presence, a steady force that both challenged and comforted her.

Slowly, Riven closed the gap between them, his hands finding the contours of her waist and pulling her close. The heat of his body was immediate, a fierce contrast to the cool night air. Mara leaned into him, the curve of his chest against her own a steady rhythm, grounding her swirling thoughts.

His lips brushed across her temple, down the line of her cheek, a ghost of a kiss that sent a shiver through her. There was no rush, only the slow, deliberate unfolding of connection—a sensual dance that teased and beckoned without haste.

Mara’s hands rose, trembling slightly, to rest against his chest. She felt the quickening beat beneath her palms, as if his heart was galloping in time with hers. The solidity of him steadied her, gave her courage to let go of the walls she'd built, brick by brick.

“You’re safe here,” Riven whispered, voice thick with emotion. “With me, you don’t need to be anything but yourself.”

The vulnerability in his words cracked something open inside her. For so long, she had worn armor—carefully curated smiles, half-truths, and silence to keep the darkness at bay. But here, in this shadowed alley where the city seemed to disappear, she allowed herself to be seen.

Her fingers tangled in the collar of his jacket, pulling him closer until their bodies pressed taut together. She inhaled deeply, intoxicated by the scent of him—something like cedarwood and smoke—and the undeniable danger simmering beneath the surface.

Their lips met at last, tentative at first, exploring the fragile newness of this moment. But the kiss deepened quickly, becoming urgent and hungry. Riven’s hand slid from her waist to cradle her face, thumb caressing her cheek as if memorizing every line and curve.

Mara’s eyes fluttered closed, surrendering to the sensation—the friction of his mouth on hers, the heat of shared breath, the intoxicating promise of something that both scared and thrilled her. Each touch was a question, each sigh a confession.

He pulled back just enough to speak, his voice a low rumble against her lips. “You’re intoxicating, Mara. Every part of you.”

She smiled against him, breathless. “So are you.”

The alley around them faded further, the night condensing into a bubble where only they existed—two souls tangled in a dangerous dance of lust and affection, craving and fear. The weight of longing pressed down, heavier than the silence that had settled moments before.

Riven’s hands began a slow journey, tracing delicate patterns along her spine and shoulders. Mara responded instinctively, arching into his touch, her fingers weaving through his hair. The connection was more than physical; it was electric, emotional—a thrilling surrender to the unknown.

“I don’t want to lose you,” she confessed quietly.

His hands stilled. He held her closer, grounding her trembling form. “You won’t. I’m not here to take—I’m here to stay. To fight for you.”

Tears pricked at the corner of her eyes—not from sadness, but from the overwhelming flood of feeling. For the first time in a long time, Mara felt the fragile stirrings of trust, a flicker of hope that this darkness could hold something beautiful after all.

Their breaths tangled together, slow and uneven. The night stretched endlessly before them, soaked in the quiet ache of closeness.

Riven’s lips found her neck, soft and reverent, drawing gentle circles that made her shiver anew. Mara’s hands clung to him, desperate to anchor herself in the warmth and surety of his touch.

“Tonight,” he whispered, voice thick with promise, “is just the beginning. There’s a fire here—between us—that no darkness can ever fully smother.”

Mara’s heart answered with a fierce beat of its own, matching his vow. She let herself fall deeper into the sensation of being held, cherished, seen—not as perfect, but as real.

Their kiss resumed, slower now, more deliberate. It spoke of promises and possibilities, of futures hinted at but not yet fully revealed. In that quiet alley where the city forgot itself, Mara found something that felt dangerously close to love—woven tightly with the lust that pulsed like a living thing between them.

As they finally parted, breaths mingling like smoke, Riven pressed a lingering kiss to her forehead. “Tomorrow will test us both,” he said softly. “But tonight… tonight is ours.”

Mara nodded, chest heaving with hope and hunger. The pull of the night, the promise of the unknown, and the taste of this fragile connection wrapped around her like a second skin.

And beneath it all, the thrilling certainty that once the darkness had been invited in, there might be no going back.

Chapter Three — The Morning After the Dark

The first thing Mara felt when she woke was the warmth.

Not the warmth of sunlight—her blinds were still drawn—but the faint trace of heat left in her skin, a ghost of the night before. She lay still, her body wrapped in her sheets, yet it wasn’t fabric she felt against her but the imprint of Riven’s hands. It was everywhere—her jaw where he had touched her like she was something fragile; her waist, where his fingers had pressed firmly, possessively; her lips, still tingling as if his kiss hadn’t ended.

Outside, the world had already started its morning noise—distant traffic, a bird somewhere singing—but to Mara, it all felt muted, as though she was listening from underwater. Her mind kept replaying the alley: the cold air, his breath against her ear, the way time seemed to fold in on itself so that only the space between them existed.

She turned onto her side and stared at her phone on the nightstand. No message yet. That wasn’t like him. Riven was usually the first to cross the night into the next day, claiming her attention before she could drift too far back into her own thoughts.

Her chest tightened with an unfamiliar sensation—was it longing? Worry? Or the simmering ache of wanting more?

She reached for the phone just as it buzzed.

One message.

Riven: It’s early. You’re thinking of last night.

A small smile curved her mouth. She typed slowly.

Mara: And if I am?

The reply came fast.

Riven: Then you understand. The city didn’t touch you last night—I did.

Her breath caught as the image resurfaced—the alley narrowing around them, his hands mapping her like uncharted territory, her body’s surrender neither forced nor reluctant, but fated.

She hesitated before answering.

Mara: You made it hard to breathe.

Riven: Because I wanted to take your breath. And I’m not done, Mara.

Her pulse quickened. She lay back on the bed, one hand pressed to her stomach, feeling the flutter beneath her palm. He had a way of writing words that felt like hands, slipping under her skin with every sentence.

The next message came before she could think of a reply.

Riven: Tonight. No alleys. Somewhere I can see you in the light—and still keep you close.

Mara: The light? I thought you thrived in shadows.

Riven: Shadows reveal more if you know how to look. Last night was the first page. Tonight, I start reading you.

Her breath deepened. She closed her eyes for a moment, picturing what “reading her” would feel like with Riven—mapping not only her body but the spaces inside her she didn’t let anyone touch.

Night didn’t come fast enough.

Mara spent the day restless, everything she did edged by the knowledge that she would see him again. Every sip of coffee tasted stronger. Every reflection she caught of herself made her wonder if she looked different—if the girl who walked into that alley last night was not the one who was now brushing her hair and trying not to look like she was anticipating danger like a lover.

And maybe she was.

When her phone finally lit up at 9:02 p.m., her body reacted before her brain caught up.

Riven: Open your door.

Her breath hitched. No address, no question—just the order. She moved through her apartment as if guided by unseen strings. When she opened the door, he was there, leaning against the frame like he could have been waiting forever.

The first thing she noticed was that he was dressed differently tonight—less shadow, more definition. A dark charcoal coat left open to reveal a black shirt that clung to him like it had been made for him alone. His hair was slightly mussed, as if he’d run his hands through it before deciding to find her.

“You’re on time,” she said, voice softer than she meant.

“I’m early,” he corrected, stepping inside without asking. “I wanted more time with you.”

The air changed when he was in her space. It was as if the walls themselves leaned closer to catch the pulse of his voice. He moved past her slowly, his arm brushing hers, and the touch—so incidental it should have been nothing—sent heat arching up her spine.

“Show me where you feel safe,” he said.

She swallowed and gestured toward the living room. The lights were low there, warm gold against the shadows spilling in from the city. He didn’t sit. Instead, he came to stand close enough that she could feel the faint heat of his body without him fully touching her.

“Last night,” he said, eyes fixed on hers, “I took the first step. Tonight… I learn.”

“Learn what?”

“How you move when you trust me. How you breathe when I’m near.” He reached up, letting his fingers trail slowly from the side of her neck down to her shoulder, each centimeter drawn out like he was etching the path into memory.

She exhaled shakily, leaning slightly toward him. His hand slid lower, curling around her waist, and this time, when he pulled her in, there was no hesitation in her body—only the matching forward motion of someone who had been impatient for the moment all day.

They stood like that for a long beat, eyes locked, breaths mingling. And then his mouth was on hers, slow and devastating. His lips moved with the precision of someone determined to learn her entirely—the places she yielded first, the faint sounds she made when his hand traveled just a little lower along her back.

Her fingers splayed against his chest, feeling the steady, powerful thrum beneath her palm. It wasn’t just desire she felt—it was the unshakable sense that he was pulling her toward something she wouldn’t come back from.

When he finally eased the kiss into stillness, their foreheads rested together, breath slightly uneven.

“You see?” he murmured. “I don’t need the alley. You bring the shadows with you.”

She almost laughed. “And you?”

“I bring the fire.”

And she believed him.

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