A pen... A blue ink plastic pen that I thought was just a sImple thing. But as I grew up, I started expressing my feelings through writing. Because sometimes... In some situations, we don't know what to do or whom to tell.

And yes I suffered from the same feeling. And when I think that there is no one who can understand me, there is no one who will understand me, no one will ever listen to my thoughts, no one will ever like them, etc. At that time, I started writing.

First I used to just have my rough copy and then write down my feelings in it and also in the worst handwriting possible so that no one can ever read that 😅.

Because I was the kind of person who is just not a normal person. Sometimes our thoughts get too extraordinary or too wild 😏, Or... Sad, heart broken, hurt and yes... That's the thing that happened to me.

I know there are many people who are suppressed. Both their voice and their opinions, even them.

And yes... I am one of them 🤧....

Even though, I was a good student, a good friend, a good sibling, a good daughter but... Never the best. I was always a choice. An option. Just something that people used for their time pass. And at that time, I was so naive to understand that. Because once a legend (me) said "People only fool that person the most, who is never loved" Because...

The person who is never loved will every time crave for love, care, attention and support.. Even if that's fake. And yes… That happens to me a lot of the time. Because even though I know what kind of person they are or what they are up to, I still ignore that. Because…. I.... I just craved love like everyone else. And of course I also had many heart breaks even if it's from family, friends, or my loved ones.

It is literally a joke that no one ever forgets to hurt me. My feelings.

But I don't cry because I am always ready for that. I am a stupid.

So... When I got to know about people around me, I really started having trust issues. I didn't know who I should tell my feelings about. And then... I started writing.

I didn't start writing because I wanted to but... Because I never get to express myself, so I expressed myself through words.

I started expressing my feelings by writing. Even in most of my stories, there are some things or parts which are connected to my real life.

And I... I really feel so happy because after knowing that the person around me is two faced but… My readers who don't even know me, have never seen me, have never talked to me are far better than my surrounding people. At least they are honest 😌. And the most loveliest.

And I literally like when someone likes my thoughts...

Because you all like my stories except my family members, friends and yes... Even if it's my gf 🤭…

Yes your author has a GF. 😉 By the way, I am a lesbian. We still haven't told about our relationship to out parents, and also it's just a 2 years relationship..

And of course just like other relationships, we also had ups and downs,, and I am a kind of person whose love is not just love… It's obsession and devotion. And I really worship the person I love. And yes I love a girl…. And her name starts with L. 😁

Okay okay aside from all this, now I want to really really apologize from all of my readers for late updates. Really late updates. 🙇

And yeah…. The main thing is that I am gonna tell you the reason that why I wasn't able to update on time and yes... It is no one else but my own sweetheart… 🤧..

I always give my everything in love. But when I don't receive the same response then…. I just feel heartbroken. Seriously 😖. And yes there's a valid reason behind that… If you want to know then you can tell me in the comments, but if you don't want to then it's okay... Even though I know that it's wrong to spill my personal matters but it's alright since there are such people who understand 😌 and they gives adivces, not taunts. So that's why I will be willing to share that with all of you.

At last I wanna tell you that this is not related to any of my stories. And as you have already read the title "Author's Life". I'm gonna write about my life or my current situation, my happiness, sadness, every moment that I think I should write.. I will write. And share that with everyone.

...~I hope you will like it...