I checked my watch after heaving for my breath making sure I sat in the same position, I quickly applied some lip balm so that I didn't have dry lips.

It was Sunday again and exactly 10:10 am the lecture was nearly finished and soon HE will be coming out, during the week I've been trying on countless outfits to make sure he still saw me. They say boys are visual creatures and I wanted him to have a couple of minutes simply admiring whatever I could possibly or rather to present that visual to him.

To make sure he saw me, so that I could leave him breathless during the week as well hoping he has a fantasy of me in mind. It wasn't more than five minutes did I hear the sounds of people coming out in high-pitched noises as they socialized sticking close to each other some already in a hurry to leave I sat up straight to appear elegant and matured, my eyes hyperactive as I searched around.

My hands were rubbing together as if I was cold but I clearly remember it was hot that day.

My eyes stared up the stairs and oh my god how could I miss him even in the crowd?

There he was with a red hoodie and a cap on, his hair was blond with a touch of brown.... exactly how I liked it too, long and perfect. I watched his pale skin shine under the sun as he briefly looked at me.

His eyes on me.

The craving of the week was satisfied, because the sun did him great justice his green eyes stuck on me I felt like I was in a forest of fantasy.

Was I alive?

No in fact I questioned if I was even breathing at all, I watched until he came downstairs and some girl in a pair of tight jeans and a baby blue shirt came to greet him even hugging him, but that didn't matter much because his eyes kept flickering to me.

I questioned for a mere second if I appeared as a creep to him but by then the song dandelions had come to an end and I had the urge to take off my headphones instead I kept sitting there looking away rather nonchalantly, , or I hoped I gave off nonchalant as I turned off the next song before it had time to play.

Playing it cool is the way to go.... When my friend came around to see me she already knew according to my smile and posture.

"I wish I knew his name." I had said as she shook her head at me "how can you have a crush on a boy with no name." I continued to complain making sure I didn't look his way again while my friend observed him for me, to tell me if he kept looking at me so I could fangirl later on till I saw him again.

He's so beautiful, Oh my God.

I smiled in bliss little did I know those butterflies in my stomach would turn into an unsatisfied itch... he was just a boy, the one I admired most, the prettiest boy I've ever had the privilege to see.

Unfortunately that's what he should've always been.

Just a boy.

A boy with no name.

"He always leaves in a rush." I grumbled as I played with my headphones. Secretly admiring someone didn't come at an easy price "Let's go get some food after this."

My friend smiled at me, she had her long hair down, and it was puffy because it was in fact the most gorgeous Afro I had ever seen I felt like I'm overpraising for a second there, she's more into soccer, cars technically complimenting me since I liked Korean dramas.

Let's make it clear that I simply liked the slowness and slow burn of things rather than to have things rushed as quickly as possible I liked the angst very much as of late, the tension and all that and I believe I'm finally experiencing it, mind you if an Asian guy came he's still a guy. I liked the culture etc. not obsessed it onto Asian people meanwhile my friend Adelina liked reality shows and movies that were definitely Wattpad like and quick to it.

I felt we complimented each other very well.

"I can't wait for you guys to talk." she said "It's cute and all but like when is he going to act? Last time when we were accidentally standing by the stairs obviously he was not expecting you to be looking he got a scare unlike someone."

Ugh someone was a boy I had liked at first, and then he spoke, and I knew a crush is lack of information. Unfortunately along the thin white lines of him being popular on top of girls liking him so much, and he knew it became rather unattractive, but I wanted him to know me, so I did some things.... Like try talking to him, and he acted like I wanted him which made me pull back rather fast I moved on so quick, but he became somewhat infuriated and my teeth ached because I now liked someone else he became an obstacle instead.

He was called blueprint because it's necessary to have a code names as ladies to avoid drama, in fact that day he was standing with him after the whole show of him hugging that girl, yet he didn't know I was looking at him, instead Mr blueprint puffed out his chest looking at us rather confidently as he spoke while Adelina and I raised our brows at his activity at least he's confident because was he in no way ugly but personality wise eh. Meanwhile the one I liked remained humble with his gaze cast downwards as he talked to blueprint.

blueprint had fluffy black hair and green eyes that had a mix of blue on top of that he knew how to dress well in fact he was taller that the one I now wanted by a few inches but this time I want things slower even when they stood next to each blueprint paled to his gorgeous hair and his red hoddie.

I liked guys with long hair. Sue me.

"Don't mention that boy." I said feeling a headache coming on at his actions, I stood up with confidence and a smile on my face. My baggy jeans kissing the ground and my white swimsuit shirt making me feel hot as I threw my back on my left shoulder.

"Well it's not my fault he's so creepy. Makes it so obvious like why he is staring to a whole point that everyone notices." she grumbled "Look at his chest all puffed out like a chicken."

"What about your little hamster." I smirked "Wasn't he running around here in black clothes as per usual."

Adelina blushed "He has a girlfriend already I just don't get why he's always staring."

Denial was a river, and she was a whole Pacific ocean and mountains.

"Is that why you refuse your attraction? Understandable but why is he staring with a whole girl next to him? Men are weird." I said peeking at him as he walked out as if the hounds of hell were chasing him.

There goes my long haired boy.

I always had this weird desire to name the person I liked the moon due to the perplexing phase.

The moon is beautiful, isn't it?

That would be so cool in fact if I thought about it carefully, it would make it beautiful in fact. I can count the amount of times I'd fallen in love basically two times with him being my third.

The first two took a whole emotional toil on me firstly a guy who doesn't defend you in front of his mom is already enough of a sign to not only ditch him but to run with all your entire being and never in fact never look back the second one is a gossip.... popular boys are not in fact as Wattpad said they'd be instead it was just horrific beyond a scale of words.

It was time for our lecture when we entered as always we sat together. Adelina was a friend I met in a full-blown friend group of four, and now it was just me and her which was actually so unexpected I don't think I've ever been shocked before. We got close rather quick due to trauma bonding the terrors of the group falling apart resulting in a loss of two friends on my side as well as hers.

The person who introduced me to her was actually Helena, she was the first extroverted person I've ever met hilarious and sarcastic beyond words she found me one random Tuesday when I was in the library, and we started talking. She was extremely curvy, but she had a cute belly pouch which she hated technically insecure about her weight she always joked about it to cope, she then introduced me to Adelina who at first was so closed off I couldn't read her and Catherine who I suspected to be a bit bisexual and spoiled with how she talked and walked I believed she got everything she wanted if she just told her mother, but you could say I didn't necessarily have the evidence in the beginning of this so-called friendship group we were all neutral simply Keeping each other company.

Unfortunately I was not the type to get close to anyone regardless I kept an emotional distance from everyone, but was lukewarm technically I was there, but I wasn't there. High school showed me flames whenever it came to female friends but Adelina and Helena grew close faster while Catherine and I remained lukewarm even towards each other.

Soon Adelina and Helena had a sleepover which I assumed was good, they posted each other more even had their daily secret words but I was too wound up from past friendships to even care about any of that until things went, south rather quickly that day I was speaking to an older Indian man with white hair he gave the best advice actually that's when Adelina and Helena came rushing me towards the mall mind you ruining the mentor's words halfway before I could process what was happening all four of us were in the mall.

Helena's 21st birthday was coming up so she had planned everything I walked at the back with Catherine as we watched them sometimes they'd include us sometimes they spoke more amongst each other when we went to the fourth store I was so hungry and pissed off and apparently everyone was regardless Helena tried to keep the mood light as possible and shiny while I hid my exhaustion Adelina and Catherine made it more known I watched everything as a bystander mind you without pitching in not even throwing in my two cents I just watched.

When we left the mall that day accompanying Catherine and Adelina to their Uber as they promised to come back after a quick meal. Mind you.... Helena and I lived far from Catherine and Adelina who lived closer.

Helena and I got a bite as she vented about today.

"I just feel like they're not invested like that." she said eating, so fast and quick too, she had opened up about her eating disorder problem before so I was extremely careful knowing I had gone through that making Sure not to judge her for any food intake as long as she ate and remained healthy rather than not eating at all to lose some weight.

"Everyone was tired." I tried to comfort as I took a bite of my burger watching blueprint looking at us with his friend Snowy in the cafeteria mind you blueprint was Helena's obsession along with another boy named Michael so I kept it a secret back then that I found blueprint rather attractive "Don't overthink it much I'm sure they'll say sorry when they return."

"sure it's just that the times we've stayed together... I mean the sleepovers it's been so hectic." She started" I'm just thinking too much."

Like always I didn't listen to the other's story but hers first, and almost painted Adelina as the bad friend. I grew more pained because it was her birthday soon and even though we were irritated we could have said it kindly.

"I'm so sorry " I said sympathetic "at least blueprint is staring."

"Yeah at you?" She said looking at me in frustration back then such words pleased me but I was in denial "I want Michael now."

She kinda made it obvious she wanted a relationship and that was kinda a problem she left as soon as we were done while Catherine and Adelina came back and I was so hot on their heels firstly I told them to apologize to the kind senior to which they did sweetly recognising the importance of age and how disrespectful they'd been then when it came to Adelina after she apologized she had her two cents to throw in meanwhile Catherine remained lukewarm as she left as for a few minutes to buy some drink.

"she wants to be complimented nearly always and I low key had a feeling she'd make herself the victim" Adelina said "I admit I was wrong with my actions, but I knew she was going to say something like that, you should listen to two sides of the story please."

I looked down nearly lost "That's true I'm sorry" I sighed reminding myself why I had to keep a distance.

Adelina opened her mouth before she could speak some more blueprint saw us, and waved at me ignoring Adelina completely because he thought every girl wanted him.

Rude.

I waved back stiffly and he came over so fast pulling me in what was a full hug, my eyes went wide and I looked at Adelina who was dumbfounded.

"See you around." he said to me before I could rebuke him for ignoring Adelina he left as quickly as he had came over.

"What?" we both said in sync "was that?"

"No way all along he was looking at you?" Adelina said "OMG."

Back then I was in shock, but I shook my head "Don't think too much you'll lose your mind as for Helena I'm a bit confused looked like a lot happened...."

"We're still gonna talk about blueprint, for weeks he's been staring at us but No it's you." Adelina had said with threat "As for Helena let me explain....."

I came back to mind when Adelina asked for a calculator next to me to which I gave her cringing at the fact that I had once liked it when blueprint hugged me like that back then after his peacock performance today right in front of him?

It's going to be a long while since I saw him again.

Horrible. And his nickname......

He was the moon.