...Aspen....

My mind wasn't working.

There I was, after ten years of marriage with the one I thought was the love of my life.

After having had a son together.

There I was, signing the divorce papers.

I shouldn't be so surprised.

From the beginning, there was never any love from my now ex-husband.

I remember meeting him on April fifteenth, the day of my older sister Dakota's 16th birthday.

He was there for her.

Which was logical, since they were best friends.

Well, "friends", since he had always been in love with my sister.

I fell in love at first sight.

I simply saw him and knew that he was the one I wanted to be with for the rest of my life.

But, that desire was one-sided.

Because for him; I was nothing more than a nuisance.

And now, here I am, divorced from the man I loved.

While he runs into the arms of the woman he has always loved.

He ran towards Dakota.

And me? I was left alone, with my little son, Calen.

...****************...

...Aspen....

Even after the divorce, I still love him.

Aziel Bradford, has been everything to me.

As I drove towards what was once my home, I couldn't help but remember our marriage.

He was never kind, affectionate, or even cordial.

He only kept up appearances in front of friends; family; and in front of our son.

He always hated me.

This is because my older sister also hates me.

I entered my old house, heading towards the living room.

There I could see Aziel, playing with our son.

My heart sank.

Knowing that the family I had dreamed of was now broken, was not easy to accept.

Even if there was never love on Aziel's part, somehow we got along. Or, perhaps, it was all in my head.

I observed that man I loved, that man with whom I shared ten years of my life. That man for whom I still sigh.

His hair as black as the dark moonless night, his eyes as blue as the deep ocean, the tattoos that peek out from his chest, under his shirt.

All of him is perfect, it is an undeniable fact.

But, all of him never belonged to me. This house; this marriage; even this family; everything should have been for Dakota.

That's what my parents and my siblings say. It's even something my own husband told me when we got married.

I have it very clear in my memory.

<>

"Calen, it's time to go."I spoke softly"."

My son, as soon as he heard me, ran into my arms, with a beautiful smile that he only gave me.

No matter what others say, Calen is my son. Regardless of who his father loves, I am still Calen's mother.

"Mommy! You're late!"My little one complained"."

I gently caressed his face, as he leaned into my caresses.

"I'm sorry I took so long, love, mommy had things to do."I explained"."

I looked up to meet cold eyes, which watched me with indifference. Those cruel eyes that still cause me so much pain.

Of course, it was always like that.

To be honest, I don't remember Aziel ever giving me even a kind look.

But, none of that matters now.

"Love."I turned my attention to my son". Say goodbye to your father, we have to go."

My little one grumbled, but obeyed.

"Goodbye daddy." "He said hugging his father".

"I'll see you on the weekend, champ."He ruffled his hair"."

I took my child's hand and we left what was once our house.

I put him in the car, secured the seat belt so there wouldn't be any accidents.

And, just as I headed to the driver's seat, Aziel called me.

"Aspen."His icy and hoarse voice made me tremble, my eyes sought his, with hope"."

Longing for him to regret it, for him to ask us to stay even if it was only for one night.

I remained calm.

"Yes?."

He was as cold and inaccessible as ever.

Even after years, he never changed.

"I hope you have it clear that this is for the best."He began". I don't love you, I never loved you and I'm never going to love you."My heart began to break with each of his harsh words". As you well know, I love Dakota. It was a mistake to get you pregnant and to have made you my wife, because that place you occupied, always belonged to your sister."

I wanted to cry.

Why was it always like that?

Not only him.

All my friends, family, everyone always flattered Dakota. While I was a worthless shadow.

I grew up in that kind of environment.

Seeing how my parents and siblings loved Dakota.

She was the second oldest daughter, after our older brother, Luke.

My parents had always wanted a daughter and, when Dakota was born, they went crazy.

Not only was she beautiful, she was perfect.

A blonde baby with deep blue eyes. She was the princess of the family and, very soon grew to become a beauty.

Then, I came along.

Dad and Mom didn't want any more female daughters, because they didn't want any girl to overshadow their princess.

That's why when they found out I was a girl, all their illusion went down the drain.

Mom and Dad set me aside.

My older brother, Luke, already had a close relationship with Dakota, so he didn't approach me either. He never treated me badly, he simply acted as if I didn't exist.

Dakota, despite her angelic face, was always bad to me.

She made sure that our parents scolded me.

She made our cousins ​​and uncles hate me.

She accused me of stealing my grandmother's special necklace, which caused even my grandparents to set me aside.

Then, Mom became pregnant again.

This time it was two twin boys.

Everyone was ecstatic, even me.

I always wanted to have younger siblings. So I tried to be the best older sister in the world.

When the twins, Kyle and Ethan were born, I took care of them, played with them. I read them bedtime stories, we even had sleepovers together.

All that was until Dakota did her thing and very soon, the twins also began to hate me.

So, I never had anyone by my side.

Not even my husband.

It was never me, it was always Dakota.

My eyes went to my son, my sweet child who loves me.

I smiled slightly.

At least, within this dark reality, I have my little ray of light.

My eyes returned to Aziel, who continued talking.

"So, I ask you, that from now on you get out of your head the idea that we will be together again. Because it won't happen. As soon as Dakota returns home, I will make her my wife." "He informed me". I'm telling you this, because whether I like it or not, you are Calen's mother. We will have to continue seeing each other even if it disgusts me. So, from now on, keep your distance from me and my future wife. "He sentenced".

You damned son of a bitch.

Ten years together and that's how he treats me?

I got into my car without saying anything.

And so I left with the only thing I had, my son.

...Aspen....

After the divorce, I was forced to buy a new house.

Luckily, Aziel didn't refuse to give me half of what was due to me for so many years of marriage.

At least with that money I was able to buy a small but nice house.

Upon arriving, my child ran inside, I followed him.

And while he played, I began to sort some boxes that were left loose.

As I did, I couldn't help but remember Aziel's words.

<>.

I began to cry silently, I didn't want my son to hear me.

When I calmed down, I looked for my phone and called my mom.

It rang once, twice, and three times.

But, Mom never answered.

I called Dad, and the result was the same.

I called Luke, and nothing.

I called the twins and they didn't answer either.

I shouldn't be surprised.

Their daughter just got divorced but, they're not even capable of answering a damn call.

I dried my tears, and composed myself, returning to my son.

But, I keep remembering, it's something I can't avoid.

<>.

Did these ten years together mean nothing to him?

Evidently not.

For him, I was just a mistake.

A mistake that ended in an unwanted pregnancy.

I remember perfectly that day, the first and only day that Aziel touched me.

It was exactly ten years ago, when I was barely seventeen years old.

My sister and Aziel had a relationship back then. Although nothing formal.

Dakota was twenty years old, while Aziel had just turned twenty-five.

That day, I was watching television in the living room, when I heard my sister come down with her suitcases packed, followed by Aziel, who was trying with all his might to prevent her from leaving.

That dialogue between those old lovers is still etched in my mind.

The way Aziel begged them not to abandon him.

The cruel way Dakota told him that she didn't love him, everything was intact in my memory.

It turns out that my sister had only used Aziel, while he was blindly in love with her.

And, when Dakota found the man of her dreams, she decided to go with him.

That man was an Italian, the only one who managed to make the unattainable Dakota fall at his feet.

That's how my sister left, leaving behind the broken hearts of everyone, especially Aziel's.

That same night, Aziel completely emptied the bar that was in my father's office.

He drank to excess.

I can still hear his laments.

<>.

<>.

<>.

All those words and more.

Words that he never said to me.

That night, I approached him.

He looked like an abandoned dog, his precious face full of tears.

His eyes red from so much drinking.

His voice hoarse from so much screaming and begging.

It hurt me so much to see him like that.

I helped him stabilize himself, and tried to take him to the guest room so he could rest but, even so, he kept crying.

<>

He repeated over and over.

He was so drunk that, the moment I put him in bed, he finally looked at me.

And all he could see, were my eyes.

Dark blue eyes like sapphires.

The same eye color as Dakota.

He stretched his hand towards my face, and with the greatest gentleness in the world, he caressed my cheek.

<>.

He had released in a whisper.

I felt my eyes fill with tears, he wasn't looking at me, he was looking at my sister. And that broke my heart.

<>.

He commented and then hugged me.

The aroma of alcohol flooded me, causing me rejection.

But, before I could push him away, Aziel stamped his lips on mine in a passionate kiss.

That was my first kiss.

I tried to pull him away, but he wouldn't let me.

I knew I should keep trying to push him away, I knew he wasn't looking at me. But, I couldn't do it.

Finally the man I loved was paying attention to me and I didn't want the moment to end.

That's how I gave myself to him.

I gave myself completely.

First kiss, first time, first everything.

When I woke up the next day, I was happy.

But, my happiness didn't last long.

Because when Aziel woke up, he looked at me with confusion and disgust.

<>.

I still remember how icy his voice was when referring to me.

The complete opposite of when he spoke to Dakota.

When he realized what we had done, he hated me even more.

<>.

His accusation, after years, still hurts.

Because it was true, I knew he thought I was Dakota. And I took advantage of that.

Thanks to my actions, Dad kicked me out of the house.

<>.

Those were my father's words, as he threw me into the street.

My brothers, mother, grandparents, everyone witnessed how my father repudiated me. None of them did anything to prevent it.

Everyone looked at me with disgust, as if I were the worst trash treading the earth.

After that, I stayed at my best friend's house, Carolina.

She is the only one who knows how bad Dakota is.

The only one who knows how cruel and indifferent everyone has been to me.

She was the only one who never turned her back on me.

A week had passed and that's when I found out I was pregnant.

I looked for Aziel, both his parents and his brothers closed the door in my face, calling me <>.

How dare they?

I tried to go back home, but not even the servants would let me pass.

Then, I had no option but to go to Aziel's university.

When I told him about the baby, he didn't believe me.

<>.

That's what he said.

With a broken heart, I returned to Carolina.

I started working because next year I had to enter university.

After eight months, Aziel arrived at Carolina's house, looking for me.

It turns out that his grandfather found out about my pregnancy, and forced him to marry me for the good of the baby.

That's why we got married.

There was never love on his part.

There never was and there never will be.