It was Wednesday just before daybreak. I was awakened by the same nightmare I had almost every night since the day of the incident, on the day I should have died. My physique was already drenched in sweat when I rose from my bed. I felt dehydrated. I desperately needed water...and maybe spaghetti.

I glanced at the clock and it was still 3 AM. I quickly swung my feet towards the floor and walked out of my room and turned on the lights before I silently descended the steps. As I made my way towards the kitchen, I jumped in dread because of the sound of the piano teasing a familiar song.

My breathing suddenly deepened, my heart was pounding wildly that I could hardly hear it and I unexpectedly began trembling. I tried to swallow my fear but It had no effect.

Great! Just great!

OMGGGGGG, what if it's a ghost?! Or worse! A monster! or what if it's GHOST THAT LOOKS LIKE A MONSTER?!  AAAHH!

Okay snap out of it Krie! Snap out of it! Deep breaths, deep breaths. I said to myself, slowly and silently gesturing towards the piano in the living area.

Anticipation surged every inch of my body when I abruptly heard someone started singing. But it dissipated rapidly, as soon as the synchronized rhythm between the voice and the piano arose to be oddly....reassuring.

Love of my life, you've hurt me

You've broken my heart and now you leave me

Love of my life can't you see?

Bring it back, bring it back

Don't take it away from me because you don't know what it means to me

By the time I reached the living room, I froze. The moonlight lent the man's details a somewhat dreadful shade. The man or...what ever it was, was partly in shadow making his face difficult to discern. Too frightened, I stood still in the silence.

Hurry back, hurry back

Please bring it back home to me

Because you don't know

What it means..to me

I could sense the ache of loneliness in the stranger's voice. The living area basically reeked to high heaven, the disgusting combination of booze and cigarette residues mixed in.

In the shadows the features remained obscured, but by then I knew exactly who it was. The dim light from the moon reflected a striking portrait of mom on top of the piano as well as the liquor beside it. He kept staring at mom's photo while he sang as if he was courting him all over again as if she was still alive as if the incident never happened at all

“Dad?” I said cautiously.

“K-krie?!” He said in shock. He stood up but I noticed he could barely sit upright.

He turned on the lights, revealing the remnants of cigarettes and dozens of beer and then wiped his face with the back of his hand. His bloodshot eyes indicated the years of pain he had endured. Time had done nothing to diminish his love for mom.

“W-why are you here?” His voice was raspy.“Shouldn't you be asleep?”

In his crapulous state, a thought abruptly reached my mind. Although there were many times I tried to say this to him but I never had the chance. This actually might be the right time to say it. It may not make sense and it may not sound logical because he's drunk, I couldn't care less.

“Do you wanna tell me something?” He asked.

I drew a slow deliberate breath and replied:

“Dad..” I said “I wanna be free”

CHAPTER 1

I'm dreaming of it again. The fire that enveloped the walls of my home. Not a single life was spared that night, the only mine. The floors were wrapped with blood as though it was a canvas with the hues of red. Everyone around me slowly getting killed. Corpses of distinct people burned along with the dim reflection of the past.

The fire was ponderous. The event unraveled in slow motion. But I remained rooted in place, watching as the flame became an inferno that began engulfing me with its blistering heat. Vicious burns crawled on my skin but I felt none.

"KRIEEEE!"

The sound of my mother's voice brought me out of my hysteria. Blinking rapidly as panic flooded every inch of my body. The hairs on my neck rise. I was breathing heavily. I wanted to help her but I was paralyzed, unable to bring myself to move.

Ashes covered half of her face, burns were all over her body. The pain she felt showed on her own wounded expression. The flame surrounded her, it didn't want to her go, like a lion feasting on its prey.

"WHY KRIE?!WHY!!" She shrieked but the fire remained unrelenting.

I woke up then, blinking rapidly as the adrenaline burst through my body along with a flash of pain in my head. Sob gripping on my own chest. My heart was thudding loudly against my ribcage. Sweat forged off me slicking my shirt.

It's been 7 years. Seven longing years.

The day mom died, a part of me died too. Since then, everything hadn't been the same. Mom was Dad's everything. He loved her beyond measure. She was the light in our family when all we had was darkness. That's why when she died, my family seemed to wither as well.

Rising from the bed, I went to see the stars and the moon on the balcony but the sky shone none. I felt a sudden stab of disappointment. There was no moon, no stars, only immense darkness above. From there, I was gripped by intense loneliness. It was that dream again, the dream I had every night, the dream where I cried myself to sleep.

Father mourned my mother's death for years which resulted in an endless cycle of booze. Day and night, he would drink alcohol. He made the world a favor by drinking himself to almost utter death. There were times when my brother had to carry him to his bed and there were also times when he would howl rampantly. It was his way of forgetting the past that plagues him still.

His addiction to alcohol almost got us bankrupt if it weren't for the help of my brother and our kin.

Dad's kidney and liver were damaged. From those moments, he had been taking medications and we'd kept consulting a therapist now and then. He never truly recovered but he'd been better

As for my brother, Kaizer, I never fully understood what happened between us. When I finally got out of the hospital, he hadn't spoken to me ever since. Only when he needed something or when dad asked of him.

By the time it reached the first anniversary of mom's death, cracks appear on the facade. It was only then when I realized why he kept pushing me away. I just didn't want to believe at first. And it turned out to be something that I have embraced in a long time.

The guilt I felt was overwhelming. Although I never recalled what really happened that night, but judging from the nightmares I've been enduring since the accident, I eventually reckoned that it was my fault.

I went straight back to bed after tears streamed down on my cheeks as the light from the lamp lent me a sense of peace.

I fell asleep.

❣

"Krie.."A voice whispered.

The drapes were quite thin which let the sunlight stream through my room. Instead of waking up, I rolled over hoping to go back to sleep but I found it impossible. The voice wouldn't let me.

"KRIE!" The voice shouted. There was a tinge of aggressiveness in the tone.

"UGHH, WHAT IS IT?!" I raised my voice.

I rolled back and glanced at the guy who seemed to be the owner of the annoying voice, my eyes half-opened. I continued studying the guy who seemed to wear a dark suit and tie.

The guy had tanned skin and curly hair. It took me a while to register who it was and by the time I did, my eyes widened in shock.

It was my brother!!

His arms were crossed, his eyes filled with rage. His intense gaze left my heart raced. I was almost speechless.

"K-kai"

It was more of a statement rather than a question.

"W-what are you d-doing here?" I asked, stuttering.

He smirked.

"Dad sent me here to remind you that you're leaving today" His voice was flat.

I shook my head, confused.

"N-no" replied."You must be mistaken, That's on Saturday"

He sighed and rolled his eyes.

"Today is Saturday" He stated as a matter-of-factly.

"But I haven't even packed yet!" I wailed.

He smirked again.

"Well, that's not my problem, is it?"

"Well, that's not my problem, is it?"I mimicked with a helium-like voice.

"WHAT WAS THAT?!"He sounded infuriated.

"N-nothing" I shook my head.

"It's still seven tho, your flight leaves at 5.You still have an extra time to prepare"

"Are you sure, it's today?" My eyebrows a questioning arc.

"Did I stutter?"He said, leaning slightly.

I blinked in surprise.

I nodded and said nothing further. It was there I learned that today, I'm finally free. A smile crept on my face as happiness and excitement surged through my system.

Kai stepped out of my room and met Chloe in the middle of the doorway. She tried to greet my brother with a smile but he ignored her. I covered my face with my sheets so that I could sleep again. I wasn't ready to wake up before and I'm still not ready now.

"So how's day 2,495 and which is apparently the last in Quarantine?" She asked, smiling.

"Like the usual but I've been better"

"So what's with your brother, he seems more irritated than usual" She asked, confused.

"He looks exactly the same to me" I replied.

"What are you doing?" She asked as she sat on the side of my bed.

"Sleeping"

"What's with you and your sheet?!" She suspected and yanked my sheets off my face. "Oh, my, god!" She screamed.

"What? Why?! Is there something on my bed?!" I asked, startled.

"You look hideous!" She declared.

The disgust she felt matched her own disgusted expression" And not even the fun kind of hideous, just... hideous"

"I, do, not!"I protested, quickly raising myself in a sitting position.

Chloe raised an eyebrow. She showed me the front camera of her cellphone in front of my face and she,was, right!. This is embarrassing!

"I see your point" I nodded, embarrassed.

"Just kidding!"Her laugh is unbridled.

"HA HA HA, very funny" I sent out a sickly smile.

"You look gorgeous! Even without makeup. Why are you so humble?" She giggled.

"I'm not" I spread my hand."I'm just ugly and that's the truth"

"No, you're not!" She protested."Have you seen that face of yours?! You're like Aphrodite, the goddess of beauty!

minus the whole...horny part"

"You really think so?" I asked.

"Yes!" She grinned."I'm gonna miss you!"

"I'm gonna miss you too" I smiled.

She leaned forward and hugged me without hesitation which didn't surprise me.

"I love you" She mumbled.

My heart suddenly ached. She has been my best friend for almost seven years now, she gave me the love of a family which Kai and Dad couldn't give. Leaving her is like leaving my own family.

I closed my eyes, feeling the relaxing rhythm of her heart, and replied.

“Me too”

CHAPTER 2

After I went up to shower, I reached for my blanket, folding it neatly and rested it over the headrests.I then sat on the  stool next to my bed where a large mirror was seated on top of a table. Chloe had already left, she said she has a date with a hot guy who apparently is two years older than her.

She was always an outgoing kind of person, she would go to parties, date hot and handsome guys, she even introduced some of them to me, and believe it or not, sometimes she'd be dozing off almost everywhere. But even though she was like that she managed to pull off decent grades.

After she was finished at her part-time job at a local coffee shop, she'd inform me about the latest trends and gossips. Gossips including my brother dating completely different girls at the store. We differed in many ways but that difference made our friendship even stronger.

As I scanned my reflection, my brush paused in mid-air. It was there I learned that I truly resembled mom in almost every way.From the light green eyes to the wavy black hair.I miss her so much.Even though my mind had forgotten her, my heart didn't.

Moments had passed,Lily, one of our youngest housekeepers, entered my room, reminding me that we're leaving after a few minutes. She was only 16 years old, her face was plump, her cheeks round and chubby. Her chin evenly soft. Her nose was a soft tall at the end. Positively, she had a face marked by beauty.

I was thrilled!

For the first time! In nearly seven years! I'm finally gonna meet new people! Convincing Dad hadn't been easy but he must have sensed how desperate I was and maybe, just maybe, he finally regained a sense of normalcy.

I grazed the necklace I was wearing, it was a prism gold chain necklace in sea glass. According to Dad, Mom gave it to me right before my birthday party, right before the night she slowly succumed to the inevitable.

By the time I could already hear the car moving outside,I quickly descended the stairs, fully clothed. I threw on a structured blazer layered with a wool coat after cramming my clothes on the luggages.

Dad greeted me with a friendly smile as I motioned towards the quite doors of my once called home. I noted how the creases formed on his forehead, a reminder of the disagreement we had earlier this week. And If it wasn't for that disagreement, I wouldn't have convinced him.

❣

The breeze was light, the sky a luminous blue and the undulating sun cast a silvery glow to the car wrapped with the hints of rain.

“You sure you wanna come with me?” Dad asked.

“Definitely” I nodded, squinting at the car before turning back to him.

The thought made me uneased. Excitement and Anxiety mixed in. It's been years since I have met new people. Heck! I can't even remember if I ever did!

In my mind, Canada was the ideal place for me to start over with my Dad. For him to move on and for me to finally meet society. For some unknown reason, my heart somehow felt attached to Canada. It's a mystery that I have not yet deciphered. But then again my whole life had always been a  mystery.

“Let's go?” Father grinned.

I sighed, my lips tugging into a smile.

“Sure!” I replied.

As much as Dad wished for me to stay, I refused. I didn't belong here, I NEVER BELONG HERE.

After I slid into the car, the engine came to life with a rumble. I took a last glance at the rear view mirror before finally focusing my eyes on the road.

By the time we reached the mainstreet, my jaw dropped, my eyes widened admiring the vibrant city lights. I couldn't stop staring! I was in complete astonishment.

The road was loud, flooded with several vehicles.I saw people from all walks of life, black and white, the elderly and babies, couples, besfriends, even families!

What a sight!

So that's a dog, I mouthed the words, nodding to myself when I sighted a Pomeranian walking with its owner.It was so cute!

I've never seen a dog, or any other pets to be exact. As ridiculous as that sounded, that's the truth.I've only seen them in movies and TV shows but I have never actually have seen one in real life.Dad was strict about almost...everything.

“Krie..” I blinked rapidly. The sound of my father's voice brought me out of my reverie.

“Yes Dad?” I asked turning my head back to him.

“Don't you forget about our agreement, understand?” Dad replied, rendering a serious expression.

“Of course, dad!” I said“Low profile, I'll do as you say, I promise” I grinned in reassurance.

“I know you will” He replied.

There was something vaguely familiar with his tone. It began to disturb me, the way he said almost felt like it was akin to a promise.

By then, I fixed my gaze at the window as I continued taking in the scene. A thought suddenly came to my mind, I felt almost ridded when I found the source of my unease.

By the time I got out of the hospital after a month, things changed. It took me days to accept the world  I had woken up.I didn't even witnessed mom's burial. There were times when I would cry, begging dad to take me to mom but he never listened. For most of the years, I wanted and I tried to run away but despite my efforts, the guards still catched me and that's where I met my bestfriend, Chloe.

Dad decided to suppress my identity from the rest of the world, endlessly outlawed from running off the mansion. Or as Chloe likes to call it as “Quarantined”. It happened when he learned that the fire wasn't an accident, someone wanted to kill us, and that someone had done exactly that. 

The story didn't surpassed the national news. For some mysterious reason, dad decided to keep the incident, confidential. He paid the witnesses and the police to keep their mouths shut as well. I became this dark family secret that should never be divulged. As unusual as that seemed, I didn't question it. Instead, I counted the days until it will end.Over the years, the story was largely forgotten, that I was almost nonexistent.

I was so alone that it had gotten to the point where I lost sight of the person who I was meant to be.I don't even now if I still have the opportunity to find that person again. I was adrift as I have ever been on my life, as though as I was a boat, endlessly drifting in a vast empty ocean.